PunsByPapa

World's Okayest Dad | Daily jokes so bad they're good | #DadJokes

[PunsByPapa @PunsByPapa]

Velcro… What a rip-off.

[PunsByPapa @PunsByPapa]

I used to work for an origami company but they folded.

#DadJokes #PunOfTheDay

[PunsByPapa @PunsByPapa]

What do you call a crowd of chess players bragging about their wins in a hotel lobby? Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer.

#BadJokes #DadJokeOfTheDay

[PunsByPapa @PunsByPapa]

It was raining cats and dogs the other day. I almost stepped in a poodle.

[PunsByPapa @PunsByPapa]

Is there a hole in your shoe? No… Then how’d you get your foot in it?

#PunOfTheDay

[PunsByPapa @PunsByPapa]

I got fired from a florist, apparently I took too many leaves.

#DadJokeOfTheDay #DadLife

[PunsByPapa @PunsByPapa]

Today, my son asked "Can I have a book mark?" and I burst into tears. 11 years old and he still doesn't know my name is Brian.

[PunsByPapa @PunsByPapa]

What do you get when you cross a rabbit with a water hose? Hare spray.

#BadJokes #DadLife

[PunsByPapa @PunsByPapa]

How do you make a water bed more bouncy. You use Spring Water

#DadJokes #PunOfTheDay

[PunsByPapa @PunsByPapa]

I saw my husband trip and fall while carrying a laundry basket full of ironed clothes. I watched it all unfold.

[PunsByPapa @PunsByPapa]

A man walks into a bar and orders helicopter flavor chips. The barman replies “sorry mate we only do plain”

[PunsByPapa @PunsByPapa]

A Sandwich walks into a bar, the bartender says “Sorry, we don’t serve food here”

[PunsByPapa @PunsByPapa]

"I'll call you later." Don't call me later, call me Dad.

#PunOfTheDay

[PunsByPapa @PunsByPapa]

Why was the broom late for the meeting? He overswept.

[PunsByPapa @PunsByPapa]

Yesterday a clown held a door open for me. I thought it was a nice jester.

#BadJokes #DadLife

[PunsByPapa @PunsByPapa]

If two vegans are having an argument, is it still considered beef?

#BadJokes #DadLife

[PunsByPapa @PunsByPapa]

I accidentally drank a bottle of invisible ink. Now I’m in hospital, waiting to be seen.

#DadLife

[PunsByPapa @PunsByPapa]

What did the grape do when he got stepped on? He let out a little wine.

#PunOfTheDay

[PunsByPapa @PunsByPapa]

I used to be a banker, but I lost interest.

#DadJokeOfTheDay #PunOfTheDay

[PunsByPapa @PunsByPapa]

What’s the advantage of living in Switzerland? Well, the flag is a big plus.

#DadJokeOfTheDay #PunOfTheDay

[PunsByPapa @PunsByPapa]

I’m on a whiskey diet. I’ve lost three days already.