RT Ferrell

I've deleted more written insults than I've published. Which, if you know me, is still pretty damning. Such is the life of a smartass who dreams of civility.

[RT Ferrell @RT_Ferrell]

Normally, I’d be bummed that Germany exited the World Cup so quickly. But not this year. They stole my pool. Perhaps I’ll have it back faster now.

[RT Ferrell @RT_Ferrell]

Anyone else see their TikTok FYP go from news/comments on the Minneapolis shitshow to absolutely garbage content? All the on-the-ground commentary has disappeared from my normal scrolling.

[RT Ferrell @RT_Ferrell]

It has gone into extra innings. I’m being held hostage by the promise of fireworks.

[RT Ferrell @RT_Ferrell]

I’m at a baseball game. I’ll never understand it. It’s more waiting than sport.

[RT Ferrell @RT_Ferrell]

Will someone please tell Canada that we're more than capable of causing our own air problems?

[RT Ferrell @RT_Ferrell]

Who are the people so blissfully unaware of spoofed number scams that they return calls from these numbers, only to reach the numbers' true owners? If they didn't seem so detached from reality, it would really be kind of sweet.

[RT Ferrell @RT_Ferrell]

#HondaElement owners now officially wave at each other as they pass by. I didn't mean to be a part of a club, but I can dig it.

[RT Ferrell @RT_Ferrell]

Go football team!

[RT Ferrell @RT_Ferrell]

Watching your team come back from a 25-point deficit to only lose by 7 is not as inspiring as you’d hope. #UNC #TarHeels

[RT Ferrell @RT_Ferrell]

I've received three callbacks lately from people I haven't called. Then they're mad when I tell them I didn't call them, and someone clearly spoofed by my number. Who still doesn't understand how that's a thing?

[RT Ferrell @RT_Ferrell]

I finally did it!
Wordle 523 1/6

🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

[RT Ferrell @RT_Ferrell]

Wordle 523 1/6

🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

[RT Ferrell @RT_Ferrell]

Where are all the drug-laced candy stories in the news this morning?

[RT Ferrell @RT_Ferrell]

Manual transmissions may be going out of vogue, but there are still enough on the road that knowing how to drive one should be a prerequisite for a valet attendant. As I was checking my daughter into the ER this morning, I had to go park my car for the valet. My daughter is fine.

[RT Ferrell @RT_Ferrell]

I heard #WileyMiddleSchool was on lockdown for a heartbeat today. Does anyone know why? I can't get any information (not even from my son who goes there).

[RT Ferrell @RT_Ferrell]

Y'all. This friend-of-the-court brief filed by #TheOnion is a work of beauty. It's worth your 20 minutes to read it from start to finish. #JonathanSwiftIsAHack https://t.co/uf9LXwR6o3

[RT Ferrell @RT_Ferrell]

Found my old Cicso Flip camera while cleaning out office filing furniture yesterday. Looking forward to seeing if there's anything still on it from the last time it was used a decade ago. Charging now.

[RT Ferrell @RT_Ferrell]

That time when you accidentally agree to a software update as you’re getting ready to start your day.

[RT Ferrell @RT_Ferrell]

Can we, collectively, stop using #airbnb? Too many hosts are corporations, they’re ruining neighborhoods, and their rental demands are absurd. It’s time we get back to hotels, people.

[RT Ferrell @RT_Ferrell]

I bought a ticket to #BikiniKill in Chapel Hill nearly 2 and a half years ago. COVID caused the concert date to change multiple times. And now, 2 weeks from the show, it's just cancelled altogether. It's no one's fault, but man does that suck.