Joey Two Shoes

I like sports, cooking, and chaos. He/Him 🇱🇧

[Joey Two Shoes @RZR_Joe]

My goat

[Matt Forte @MattForte22]

I still don’t understand the 3rd/4th down run from shotgun 🤦🏽‍♂️.

[Joey Two Shoes @RZR_Joe]

@huggopeacelove “No straw poking required” like that isn’t the best part of drinking a capri sun

[Joey Two Shoes @RZR_Joe]

Yall can refund the rest of my ticket, that would certainly help!

[americanair @AmericanAir]

@RZR_Joe We extend our deepest apologies for the delays to your travel. We try our best not to have delays/ cancelations, but sadly sometimes it's unavoidable. Hopefully, we haven't lost you entirely.

[Joey Two Shoes @RZR_Joe]

Haven’t tweeted in literal months - but @AmericanAir is so bad I have to get on this app to remind y’all not to fly with them

Cancelled flight made us nearly miss our friend’s wedding, and then on the way back our flight got so delayed we had to switch flights

Fuck @AmericanAir

[Zach Valvo @ValvoZach]

RT for JP Losman
Fav for Brady

[Joey Two Shoes @RZR_Joe]

Vaults in NOLA and BR confirmed

[Joey Two Shoes @RZR_Joe]

@in_yacht @Super70sSports Wrong. Knuckleball > fastball in terms of entertainment factor

[Joey Two Shoes @RZR_Joe]

Exhaustive pros and cons list of working at a brewery:

Pros:
1. I can drink all the beer that I want

Cons:
1. I can drink all the beer that I want

[Joey Two Shoes @RZR_Joe]

I enter a fiery rage

[Koko Chelly 🎙️💕 @_onyxbby]

what's a song y'all hear that pisses you off immediately??

[Joey Two Shoes @RZR_Joe]

@RZR_Davey 🫡

[Joey Two Shoes @RZR_Joe]

I literally learned about this in high school.

[J.K. Rowling @jk_rowling]

I just… how? How did you type this out and press send without thinking ‘I should maybe check my source for this, because it might’ve been a fever dream’?

[Joey Two Shoes @RZR_Joe]

What happened to the breed of Christians that simply denied evolution and the Big Bang? Now they’re denying the existence of ATOMS? Bro I’m so done

[Joey Two Shoes @RZR_Joe]

Kris be honest but did you eat the tasty looking potato chips off the walls of your childhood home

[Kris W. Kobach @KrisKobach1787]

Biden wants to replace lead pipes. He failed to mention that the unfunded mandate sets an almost impossible timeline, will cost billions, infringe on the rights of the States and their residents – all for benefits that may be entirely speculative. #sotu https://t.co/CD6zaEHK9M

[Joey Two Shoes @RZR_Joe]

@huggopeacelove Wish I was kidding!

[Joey Two Shoes @RZR_Joe]

You can tell that gentrification is in its final stages when you start to see ads for “concepts”

Just saw an ad for a Baton Rouge barbershop concept and I want to drive off a cliff

[Joey Two Shoes @RZR_Joe]

I don’t have a problem with this opinion until you camp in the left lane on the highway

[Reed🇺🇸🇸🇪 @TheSotaSwede]

It’s ok to drive a little under the speed limit, even in good driving conditions

[Joey Two Shoes @RZR_Joe]

I now understand why there’s so much rage baiting on TikTok. Shit’s profitable af