Rachel Ryan/New Account, Same Schtick

Professional partner in crime. Crossword connoisseur. Unintentionally Funny. Writer of long-winded comments.
Inquiries: [email protected]

[Rachel Ryan/New Account, Same Schtick @Rachel_RyanUSA]

Murphy’s Law has been thwarting me at every turn lately.

Who wants to take me out & turn my frown upside down? I travel if you’re not local, & offer virtual if a DMTY/FMTY is not an option. Contact info is in my bio. Or you can send something via Throne: https://t.co/aDMEUFRtJ7

[Rachel Ryan/New Account, Same Schtick @Rachel_RyanUSA]

@shadowweaverss @CartoonsHateHer This is how I read it too initially. 😆

I was like, “uh…is that supposed to be a brag?” Also, what a random number. Though I guess if you only owned 9 books, or had only ever read 9 books, you’d likely remember every single one by name. Easily.

[Rachel Ryan/New Account, Same Schtick @Rachel_RyanUSA]

Yep. Every time I see a clip of Body Electric or one of Jane Fonda’s workout videos from the eighties, I’m always side-eyeing the little bottoms that are essentially a pair of Lycra panties or a thong they’d wear over a leotard.

Like, what do you mean women dress like wh0res at the gym NOW? That’s always been the standard. It’s hot in there and you work hard for that physique. May as well show it off?

[Rachel Ryan/New Account, Same Schtick @Rachel_RyanUSA]

The best part of my 3-4 week road trip was not having time to do social media BS. Between driving, exploring, packing/unpacking, and simply meeting my basic needs? There were no more hours left in the day. That said, I DID get an assload of great content that I’ve been micro dosing to my work socials over the past few months. That’s how I would recommend everyone do road trips: as unplugged as possible. Batch the content and save it for when you get back and aren’t doing anything noteworthy.

It’s humbling that you even considered trying to keep up with posting on socials AND blogging during your trip. The fact that you did it during the first two months is admirable. Enjoy what’s left of your trip and savor those moments away from tech and any commitments.

[Rachel Ryan/New Account, Same Schtick @Rachel_RyanUSA]

@SociaCin @elleloveCHI I think it might be part of the criterion at this point. They have correctly assessed that it will go over badly if they release that information to the public…

I jest, but at this point, anything seems possible!

[Rachel Ryan/New Account, Same Schtick @Rachel_RyanUSA]

I feel like a presidential run could be either an attempt at a new venture…or simply a tease to keep himself in the public eye, à la Kanye a few years ago. Remember when he said he was running for president?

At this point, it’s a coin toss. But I’m not sure he wouldn’t be an improvement at this point. 🤔

[Rachel Ryan/New Account, Same Schtick @Rachel_RyanUSA]

You’re right. Though most of us forgot about him after ‘Crank That!’ and the accompanying dance, he’s been a busy man, with investments and side businesses in gaming consoles and accessories, smoke products, a clothing line, fragrances, a beverage, and my personal favorite: “Soulja Soap,” a flavored detergent (eww) that apparently spiked in popularity during the pandemic.

“YOOOOOOOUUU…”

[BasketChase @BasketCh4s3]

@clarabelless I don’t have a foot fetish but I have sucked toes bc tf am I gonna do when a bad bitch asks me to, tell her no? If a dude wouldn’t choke on a strap for you he doesn’t want you enough.

[Rachel Ryan/New Account, Same Schtick @Rachel_RyanUSA]

Oh man, I really this gal’s work. It’s got a super dark and moody vibe that I struggle to find with the some of the typical escort photogs. These are the suggestions I come to Twitter for! 🙃

I saw you shouted out Taryn below too. I’ve shot with her a couple times. She’s fun and very easy to work with. Good at giving direction too.

[Rachel Ryan/New Account, Same Schtick @Rachel_RyanUSA]

Loved, adored…but don’t forget hot.😉

When folks make comments like that, I think they forget that it’s not an accomplishment or a rarity to be a hot twenty-something. Being a hot fifty-something take work, effort, money…and often some genetic blessings. The older I get the more I realize trying to call a woman who objectively looks good “old” as an insult has the opposite effect. When it comes out someone is hot AND 40, the replies are like…”dayum!”

[Rachel Ryan/New Account, Same Schtick @Rachel_RyanUSA]

She was definitely good at her job, if not legendary. I know a few women like this. I think people would be surprised that successful women who are 40 plus in the adult industry aren’t a rarity. Now they’re definitely not a dime-a-dozen like a twenty-something, but that’s what makes them special.

Many men aren’t looking for an experience with someone young enough to be their daughter…much less their granddaughter. 🫠 Women over a certain age also have much more refined skills than someone 30-40 years their junior.

[Wonko the Sane @Amuk31]

@gregthesorcerer The official terms are Expensive Doxy, Haughty Courtesan, and Wealthy Procuress.

[Rachel Ryan/New Account, Same Schtick @Rachel_RyanUSA]

They still exist! 😉

Same skillset and job requirements, just in a different era.

[Greg the Sorcerer @gregthesorcerer]

The term “common whore” implies that there also exist uncommon, rare, and legendary whores

[Rachel Ryan/New Account, Same Schtick @Rachel_RyanUSA]

The last time someone posted something about the elusive concept of “checking out,” I snapped a picture of the massive stacks of hotel key cards I’ve been collecting the past few years. 😆 They don’t need them back. I stayed at one really grumpy mom and pop location last summer that demanded their key cards be returned or be charged a fee.

Those people were an exception. They were forgiven for the adorably kitschy hotel…

[Rachel Ryan/New Account, Same Schtick @Rachel_RyanUSA]

This is how I find out these two were a couple. I swear it’s so common I only find out about celeb marriages when they split…kind of like I can think of at least five C-list celebs who I hadn’t even heard of until they passed, and who have achieved more fame posthumously.

[Daily Loud @DailyLoud]

Mia Goth files to divorce Shia LaBeouf.

[Rachel Ryan/New Account, Same Schtick @Rachel_RyanUSA]

As much as I hate Meta platforms, I just created a work Insta last week bc I figured it’s worth a try to see if the algo is better. It’s true that rage bait seems to work over here. I intensely despise drama though—fabricated or not—so I shan’t be rage baiting. My target clientele are dudes who aren’t into cat fights anyhow.

[Rachel Ryan/New Account, Same Schtick @Rachel_RyanUSA]

This is really why I post so little here anymore. It just doesn’t seem worth it when the algorithm sucks so badly. Every time you build an account back up, it gets deleted again. I just got one of those social media management apps so I can schedule my posts for the week consistently and shit post as I feel like in between.

What’s wild is as boring as Bsky is, their algo is great compared to here. It sucks bc Twitter used to be lit. I got so many good clients here and it was fun.

[Dr. Lovejoy @FemdomTherapy]

Sad to hear about @bratty_nikki. She was the first person I met when I wasn’t face out yet. When she moved to Los Angeles and knew no one, I welcomed her into my home and had no idea she owned @iwantclips, and that turned into holidays shared together with friends and family. She later asked me to host a radio show for @iwantclips which turned into a dream opportunity I’ll always be grateful for. We had such a fun time together, crazy times and made fabulous memories. She had a beautiful soul. I hope she is at peace now and drinking endless glasses of Dom in luxury heaven. 🥂

[«luckylex&gigs» @lexjeanne]

@llanohen i thought that was jennifer garner aniston j parker