Rai Mahmood Hussain

Regular sleeper. Even now, I'm half aslee...

[Rai Mahmood Hussain @RaiMahmood]

In honour of world book day, I pledge to only read the books I’ve already read in compliance with the promise I made on world tree day.

[Rai Mahmood Hussain @RaiMahmood]

I intend to break the chains of tradition by telling the next generation that my hair did, in fact, turn grey in the sun.

[Rai Mahmood Hussain @RaiMahmood]

A quick way to tell if a restaurant is fancy or not is that the former will have drawn one slanted line outside their washroom to make you guess the gender.

[Rai Mahmood Hussain @RaiMahmood]

“You can see the watch’s skeleton. All the intricate inner mechanics are visible so it’s hard for you to accurately detect time. We have no option other than solid colours for the strap. That will be nine hundred bajillion.” — Luxury watch salesmen

[Rai Mahmood Hussain @RaiMahmood]

Conversations in David Szalay’s ‘Flesh’.

[. @playboicurrryy]

cashier: cash or card

me: card

cashier: ok

[Rai Mahmood Hussain @RaiMahmood]

For my birthday, she didn’t bring a large cake, fearing that I might overindulge and finish it in a couple of sittings, and instead brought a smaller one …which I then devoured in one go.

[Rai Mahmood Hussain @RaiMahmood]

For our anniversary, my wife got the cake I liked, and I — thinking that she must have bought the cake she preferred — also got the cake I liked. So, now we have two cakes of my choice and I’m not allowed to touch either.

[Rai Mahmood Hussain @RaiMahmood]

Use ChatGPT to share random and obscure thoughts? Nah, I’ve already got ChatBiwiT for that.

[Rai Mahmood Hussain @RaiMahmood]

@coffeedot22 @TheCinesthetic Best Dexter villain. 🙌

[Rai Mahmood Hussain @RaiMahmood]

@EducatedMoron @coffeedot22, @ShahidButt10.

[Rai Mahmood Hussain @RaiMahmood]

SHE SAID YESSSSS!!!! (I asked her if she thought I was incapable of holding any thought other than childish.)

[Rai Mahmood Hussain @RaiMahmood]

“WHAT THE HELL????!!!!!” — Lahore’s birds from tomorrow

[Rai Mahmood Hussain @RaiMahmood]

@imriona @coffeedot22, @abdullah_____sd, @panoplyofsmoke.

[Rai Mahmood Hussain @RaiMahmood]

@CaffeinatedLiha @abdullah_____sd @panoplyofsmoke

[Rai Mahmood Hussain @RaiMahmood]

@abdullah_____sd @panoplyofsmoke 🌚🌝

[Rai Mahmood Hussain @RaiMahmood]

Whenever my wife leaves town for a day or two, I buy my favourite cake to make up for the impending loss of sweetness in my life and certainly NOT because my excessive sugar indulgence can go unchecked.

[Rai Mahmood Hussain @RaiMahmood]

@abdullah_____sd

[Rai Mahmood Hussain @RaiMahmood]

Other food items in the local food community must feel a tinge of envy seeing soup referred to by its menu serial number all the time.

[Rai Mahmood Hussain @RaiMahmood]

@abdullah_____sd The greatest season of all. And not only because I mostly meet you during it.

[Rai Mahmood Hussain @RaiMahmood]

Amongst the dos and don’ts of wedding season, the biggest do I can think of is, “Don’t go.”

[Rai Mahmood Hussain @RaiMahmood]

@panoplyofsmoke @ZohranKMamdani 😏🙂‍↔️