Randall

I'm in your books and in your ears. Clean the wax from the pages, highlight your teeth now. #SmurfHater

[Randall @RandallBabyyy]

Did you know cows prefer being eaten alive? It elongates their life and gives them time to think about the real issues.

[Randall @RandallBabyyy]

Did you know cross-contamination is your friend? It actually builds good bacteria in your gut.

[Randall @RandallBabyyy]

Eat turds and poop food, y’all. It doesn’t need to make sense as long as it tastes good.

[Randall @RandallBabyyy]

Good morrow, Dorito munchers. Chomp that Romaine to spit it out. Plug your face if you don’t want real vitamins. Hit a bird today.

[Randall @RandallBabyyy]

What’s happening

[Randall @RandallBabyyy]

HEY EV…

[Randall @RandallBabyyy]

When your dog says words so you hit it but find out later it would’ve been alright cuz not all the words it said were fake

[Randall @RandallBabyyy]

@L_UNDERSCORE_J I gotchu

[Taco Bell @tacobell]

It's gonna be M—exican Pizza soon.

[trashboat @L_UNDERSCORE_J]

READ MORE POTTERY

[trashboat @L_UNDERSCORE_J]

@RandallBabyyy DANG RANDALL! COMIN OUT OF RETIREMENT FIRING BULLETS!!!

[Randall @RandallBabyyy]

@L_UNDERSCORE_J Your mom’s a Bugatti ya gold plated paper plate. Trade your bike for a scooter, man.

[Randall @RandallBabyyy]

@mae_bennett

[Randall @RandallBabyyy]

Normalize having to use half a roll of toilet paper to wipe clean. That shy lil turd in there that seemingly stays out just far enough to mark the paper shouldn’t be shamed just for hesitating like a lil kid scared to jump in the pool.

[Randall @RandallBabyyy]

Cram it down

[Randall @RandallBabyyy]

Wyd

[Randall @RandallBabyyy]

When you’re taking a dump in public, no one else in the entire bathroom, and are about to come out of the stall but hear someone come in and go, “Oof,” do you wait for them to leave to come out?

[Randall @RandallBabyyy]

Again.

[Randall @RandallBabyyy]

The confusing excitement when you first have to fart

[Randall @RandallBabyyy]

And the horrible, shameful realization: you’ve pooped your pants.