Kim Jong Un

Almost twenty years in power with no sustained sexual harassment complaints.

[Kim Jong Un @RealKimJong_Un]

Imagine how much better the U.S. would be if they'd done this with @kanyewest

[Jack Posobiec @JackPosobiec]

Kim Jong-un calls K-pop a 'vicious cancer' and threatens anyone caught listening to it with 15 YEARS in a labour camp
https://t.co/uuRPUJx8H8

[Kim Jong Un @RealKimJong_Un]

I once demanded three women face down on a king-size bed and a leprechaun overseer with a garden hose as a whip, so...

[The Hill @thehill]

Bernie Sanders demanded king-size hotel beds, cool rooms on campaign trail, book says https://t.co/bp2C0X7e4G

[Kim Jong Un @RealKimJong_Un]

I only launch a missile every time the Pyongyang @tacobell runs out of Chalupas.

[Kim Jong Un @RealKimJong_Un]

A lot of women say my car is completely silent.

[Doug Benson @DougBenson]

Dudes who drive loud cars have the tiniest dicks imaginable. #SmallBusinessSaturday

[Kim Jong Un @RealKimJong_Un]

#KimJongMoon coin solves all your efficiency problems, bro.

[Elon Musk @elonmusk]

Working with Doge devs to improve system transaction efficiency. Potentially promising.

[Kim Jong Un @RealKimJong_Un]

When the Russians hacked my oil supply they demanded three goats and a tambourine player as ransom.

[Kim Jong Un @RealKimJong_Un]

My rockets have a better chance of reaching the moon than #dogecoin.

[Kim Jong Un @RealKimJong_Un]

Just between us, I have a feeling that #ChineseRocket is going to land on my ex-wife's house, whether it actually does or not.

[Kim Jong Un @RealKimJong_Un]

DogeJong-uncoin though

[Kim Jong Un @RealKimJong_Un]

"One of the side effects of the #COVID19 vaccine is enlarged penis." - me as I'm casually flashing my vaccination card around the secretaries at the presidential palace.

[Kim Jong Un @RealKimJong_Un]

I've had three people executed this week for using the word, "Ginormous."

[Kim Jong Un @RealKimJong_Un]

In order to protect myself against catching Covid, I've made all my sexual partners cover their entire face since about 1999.

[Kim Jong Un @RealKimJong_Un]

There's nothing sexier than an Asian girl with a plump, really well filled out vaccination card.

[Kim Jong Un @RealKimJong_Un]

Cookie dough Blizzards. Also homicidal tendencies toward those who annoy me. #WhyImSingle

[Kim Jong Un @RealKimJong_Un]

.@JoeBiden Why do hot dogs come in packs of 10 when you can only eat 8 before you throw up?

[Kim Jong Un @RealKimJong_Un]

Thinking about coming to America to vacation in Yo semite national park, but worried I might run into a Jew.

[Kim Jong Un @RealKimJong_Un]

Fat people disgust me

[Kim Jong Un @RealKimJong_Un]

I can finally admit that I was the one who shorted Game Stop.

[Kim Jong Un @RealKimJong_Un]

I can't seem to reach anybody with @Bitcoin customer service.

[Kim Jong Un @RealKimJong_Un]

The little red button on my desk orders a bucket of KFC extra crispy and launches a nuke at the same time, so...

[Tom Newton Dunn @tnewtondunn]

President Biden has removed the Diet Coke button. When @ShippersUnbound and I interviewed Donald Trump in 2019, we became fascinated by what the little red button did. Eventually Trump pressed it, and a butler swiftly brought in a Diet Coke on a silver platter. It's gone now.