Red London Bus

The musings of a London Bus, a Red one, from the way I see things. Remember, I'm a Bus not a Bin! I Bus, therefore I am!

[Red London Bus @RedLondonBus]

Full of loads of coffin-dodgers. Feel like the Grim Reapers mobile waiting room. Also, have a sticky upper floor! #shitcleaners

[Red London Bus @RedLondonBus]

@Good_Moaning_ Bit late, like us buses!

[Red London Bus @RedLondonBus]

Spider guts on my windscreen... Not great! #dontjumpfromatreeintome

[Red London Bus @RedLondonBus]

Toyota Prius drivers - crap driving miscreants who have deluded themselves they are saving the planet. They are not, their just pratts.

[Red London Bus @RedLondonBus]

Odd one that!

[Red London Bus @RedLondonBus]

Looking forward to listening to all the twatty teenagers and saddo jobless talk about the #xfactor tomorrow... Not! #craptv

[Red London Bus @RedLondonBus]

Explain what roadkill is? I'm not going over that again!

[Red London Bus @RedLondonBus]

My horn is pathetic! It's 3 inches and makes a feeble squeaking noise. I want one that is 9 inches and goes Boom!!!

[Red London Bus @RedLondonBus]

Sunday bloody Sunday, when all the passengers appear to be extra's from '28 days later'!

[Red London Bus @RedLondonBus]

Been graffiti'ed on last night. Now I can be read all over!

[Red London Bus @RedLondonBus]

I dropped my cuddley teddy bear with a bus t-shirt on. He subsequently got ran over and a cunt skip truck. He was Bus-ted... #badjokes

[Red London Bus @RedLondonBus]

#tvshowsigrewupwith On the Buses and Coach Trip... Duh!

[Red London Bus @RedLondonBus]

Just been called a #pleb by some politician sort for not opening my doors. What does that mean? Passenger Loathing Educated Bus? #accuate

[Red London Bus @RedLondonBus]

Raining cats and dogs in the isle of dogs. Have wet dog smell on my seats and just ran over some runny dog shit. Basically, a dog of a day!

[Red London Bus @RedLondonBus]

Had a cigarette stubbed out on me today by a chain-smoking teenage waster. Is it cos I is red??

[Red London Bus @RedLondonBus]

Fucking pigeons, flying out first thing in the morning and splating on my windscreen. How inconsiderate! #flyingrats

[Red London Bus @RedLondonBus]

Full of fat people. Feel like a box of shot putts! My axles are starting to hurt, damn weightwatchers meeting! #stopeating

[Red London Bus @RedLondonBus]

So, #london2012 is over, and I have to admit I was Soooooo not as busy as the drivers unions predicted. Trouble making Tossers. #keeprolling

[Red London Bus @RedLondonBus]

Just rollin'....

[Red London Bus @RedLondonBus]

Sneaked into the transport museum again... Having a chat with my grandfather about how the @MayorofLondon got rid of the benders... #newguys