When you find a sovereign God "unbearable" and choose a more comfortable view, your mind acts as a "factory”, manufacturing an empty phantom that fits your preferred reality.
This is idolatry. The foundational sin of Holy Scripture.
"Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved" Rom 10:13
Reformed theology doesn’t erase this choice, it explains it. We make a genuine choice to call on Jesus because the Holy Spirit first gave us a new heart to see His beauty. Our decision is real.
Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change. Of his own will he brought us forth by the word of truth that we should be a kind of firstfruits of his creatures.
James 1:17-18
“And the Levites carried the ark of God on their shoulders with the poles, as Moses had commanded according to the word of the Lord.”
1 Chronicles 15:15, ESV
“Because you did not carry it the first time, the Lord our God broke out against us, because we did not seek him according to the rule.”
1 Chronicles 15:13, ESV
so shall my word be that goes out from my mouth; it shall not return to me empty,
but it shall accomplish that which I purpose, and shall succeed in the thing for which I sent it.
Isaiah 55:11, ESV
“All things are lawful for me, but not all things are profitable. All things are lawful for me, but I will not be mastered by anything.”
1 Corinthians 6:12, NASB95
The Spirit and the bride say, “Come.” And let the one who hears say, “Come.” And let the one who is thirsty come; let the one who wishes take the water of life without cost.
Revelation 22:17, NASB95