K. Baldwin

Christian, author, and magnificent introvert!

Deddybear in the Metalocalypse fandom.

[K. Baldwin @RestlessGypsie]

#BookRecommendation

Nix had a few thorns in his side—and they all happened to be dead. #Paranormal #Horror

KDP: https://t.co/zhnAC0etnR

Paperback: https://t.co/iuIwaVpWyD

[K. Baldwin @RestlessGypsie]

@realMaalouf John 3:16 is the everlasting answer.

[K. Baldwin @RestlessGypsie]

To loosely quote Blackie Lawless from many years ago; "Damnit, I just wanna be somebody!"

[Nature is Amazing ☘️ @AMAZlNGNATURE]

Young black bear enters Alaskan mall, grabs a peach, relieves itself on the floor, and walks away

[K. Baldwin @RestlessGypsie]

@messedupfoods First, that frosting looks like play-doh, ugh. Second, the lip smacking throughout. On top of everything else wrong with that. I honestly am having a hard time wiping the grimace off my face right now.

[Imperio Estoico. @ImperioEstoico]

La modelo Hannah Stocking posee la rara habilidad de controlar voluntariamente la dilatación y constricción de sus pupilas. Esto se denomina modulación pupilar voluntaria, mediante la cual las personas pueden eludir el sistema nervioso autónomo.

[The Random Recruiter @randomrecruiter]

This is what the average meeting at a Fortune 500 company sounds like.

[AlphaFox @alphafox]

Messing with scammers: 😭

[K. Baldwin @RestlessGypsie]

@adeosunesther37 Severe depression for both my co-author and I, lack of interest in the first book and caregiving/work obligations on my end.

[K. Baldwin @RestlessGypsie]

I need a beta reader, but at the same time, that means I have to get back to actively writing. 🫣

[K. Baldwin @RestlessGypsie]

@ReciprocitEye @YFIHQ No, I'm sorry.

Hebrews 9:27

[K. Baldwin @RestlessGypsie]

@YFIHQ God doesn't promise us tomorrow.

I do know who my Grandfather's father was, gratefully. He made such a lasting impact on my Mom that she still, at nearly 78, talks about him to this day. Be the impact.

[YFI 𝕏 @YFIHQ]

I think about this video often.

[K. Baldwin @RestlessGypsie]

@alphafox I'd trade that walk-in closet for a nice master bath.

[K. Baldwin @RestlessGypsie]

@alphafox She's having fun. At least she wasn't lip-synching.

[K. Baldwin @RestlessGypsie]

@alphafox That's why I want them to build my house. It'll be done right, by Americans. No short cuts, no slacking, just quality.

[AlphaFox @alphafox]

The Amish get done in a day what would take a crew of men a week to complete with modern equipment:

[K. Baldwin @RestlessGypsie]

@jason_blum @UniPicsAtHome @blumhouse Your Side of Midnight.

[Bluegrasspatriot @kylawndog]

Normally, I avoid AI posts. This one is true and funny to me. Cat sings about gifting his ungrateful human.
Enjoy! 🤭

[𝕭𝖊𝖓𝖓𝖎𝖊✨ @Bennieeexyz]

Jury duty letter came addressed to my cat.

Not a mistake. "Felix Martinez" - that's his full name according to his vet records.

My last name. His first name. Somehow he's a registered voter now.

Called the county clerk.

Me: My cat got summoned for jury duty.

Clerk: Is the name correct on the summons?

Me: Yes, but he's a cat.

Clerk: Is Felix Martinez a legal resident of this county?

Me: He's a legal cat.

Clerk: Sir, if the name matches our records, he needs to appear or file an exemption.

Me: He can't file anything. He has paws.

Clerk: You can file on his behalf.

Me: Under what exemption? There's no box for "is a cat."

Clerk: (pause) Check "unable to serve due to medical reasons."

Me: What's the medical reason?

Clerk: He's a cat.

Me: That's not a medical condition.

Clerk: It is if it prevents him from serving.

Sent in the form. Got rejected two weeks later.

"Insufficient documentation. Please provide medical professional's statement."

Took the letter to my vet.

Me: I need you to write that my cat can't do jury duty.

Vet: Why is your cat summoned for jury duty?

Me: Excellent question. No good answer.

Vet: This is the weirdest request I've gotten.

Me: Can you just write that he's medically unfit to serve?

Vet: On what grounds?

Me: He's a cat.

Vet: (started typing) "Patient is unable to serve due to species-related limitations including inability to speak, read, or comprehend legal proceedings."

Me: Perfect.

Sent it in. Got another rejection.

"Summons is mandatory. Failure to appear will result in contempt of court."

My roommate thought this was hilarious.

Roommate: Felix is going to jail.

Me: This is serious.

Roommate: Bring him to court. See what happens.

Decided that was actually the only option left.

Day of jury duty, put Felix in his carrier. Brought the entire paper trail of rejection letters.

Checked in at the courthouse.

Clerk: Name?

Me: Felix Martinez.

Clerk: (looked at the cat carrier) Is that Felix?

Me: Yes.

Clerk: (long stare) He's a cat.

Me: I've been saying that for six weeks.

Clerk: Why didn't you file an exemption?

Me: I filed three. All rejected.

Showed her the letters. She read through them, expression shifting from confusion to disbelief.

Clerk: Someone rejected the veterinary documentation?

Me: Twice.

Clerk: (called her supervisor over) You need to see this.

Supervisor read everything. Looked at Felix. Looked at me.

Supervisor: How did a cat get registered to vote?

Me: You tell me.

Supervisor: This is a data error.

Me: Took you six weeks to figure that out.

They dismissed Felix immediately. Apologized for the inconvenience.

Supervisor: We'll remove him from the voter registry.

Me: Appreciate it.

Supervisor: (pause) Out of curiosity, how would he have voted?

Me: Probably whatever party supports universal treats.

Got a formal apology letter a week later and a voter registration card.

For me this time. Apparently I wasn't registered, but my cat was.

Roommate: Felix committed voter fraud.

Me: Felix committed nothing. He's innocent.

Roommate: That's what they all say.

Felix is sleeping on the jury summons now.

Fitting end to his legal career.

[We don't deserve cats 😺 @catsareblessing]

Cats Are Random And Unpredictable

[Renatta Oxendine @Renatta]

I don’t know what kind of day you’ve had, but I do know God got you through it. Rest well tonight knowing He is in full control.

Good night and may God bless you all. I love you all.