Rando

Comedian, fat guy, award-winning humor columnist, Time's '06 person of the Year. Following is not an endorsement

[Rando @RestlessN8iv]

Me on Twitter:
"Can I make a joke out of this?"
*scroll*
"Can I make a joke out of this?"
*scroll*
"Can I make a joke out of this?"
*scroll*

[Rando @RestlessN8iv]

@PlayStation network and the McDonald's Ice Cream machine have something in common

[Rando @RestlessN8iv]

just woke up from a dream in which I played @ConanExiles with @ConanOBrien. Best dream ever. and @jonstewart was there too, idk why.

[Rando @RestlessN8iv]

I may not be verified, but I am certifiable!

[Rando @RestlessN8iv]

@human_not_bees Just because you are 100 percent correct does not give you the right to be rude. Good day, sir.

[Rando @RestlessN8iv]

@woketopus @human_not_bees That's a damn lie, but we do encourage this myth. We hate traffic.

[Rando @RestlessN8iv]

Garth Brooks: "Blame it all on my roots, I showed up in boots"

Audience: *cheers*

Garth Brooks: "and ruined Eddie Murphey's couch"

Audience: "???"

Rick James: *takes off Garth Brooks mask*

[Rando @RestlessN8iv]

Did anyone else think this photo of Prince from 1989 was @BrandonLOVESYOU ?

[Rando @RestlessN8iv]

I must admit, I'm a little disappointed that @TheRogueRocket hasn't covered the actual rogue rocket plummeting to Earth right now.

[Rando @RestlessN8iv]

A good joke makes me laugh. a great joke makes me jealous.
I just heard @fluffyguy's bit on DC Comics, and I am insanely jealous!

[Rando @RestlessN8iv]

@StephenKing make it a pop up book. That'll scare some folk.

[Rando @RestlessN8iv]

@redlianak

[NeverBenFunny 🍥 @STMPod]

Episode 165 "Micro Aggressions"
G: @DrownedOutSC
H: @neverbenfunny
@RestlessN8iv

SOTW : @DrownedOutSC
@curtaincallgrp

#podcast #PodernFamily #comedy #offensive  #nsfw #spotify #pandora #itunes #wyoming #band #rock

https://t.co/OwITy7Xird

[Rando @RestlessN8iv]

@redlianak Being a total SP Stan myself, I fail to see the problem here. Which songs?

[Rando @RestlessN8iv]

happy birthday to @JimCarrey @jamesearljones and @BettyMWhite!!

[Rando @RestlessN8iv]

Turn signal?

[Elon Musk @elonmusk]

Use Signal

[Rando @RestlessN8iv]

Trump was talking to rioters like:

[Rando @RestlessN8iv]

I hate how accurate this likely is.

[Mr. Onederful® @ericonederful]

The rest of the world is watching America like America watched Tiger King.

[Rando @RestlessN8iv]

did...did things calm down yet?

[Rando @RestlessN8iv]

Me: "I wonder what Twitter is doing"
My brain: "Don't!"
Me: "What it's just Twitte- oh. Ohh!"
Brain: "I tried to warn you, it's an election year."

See you in 2021 everyone

[Rando @RestlessN8iv]

@kfcgaming "KFConsole"? You shoulda called it the "X-Bucket"

[Rando @RestlessN8iv]

When you make an awkward anime reference during a podcast and your virginity grows back

[NeverBenFunny 🍥 @STMPod]

Live at 8 pm central on come hang.

With @SonicOctaneBand

@NeverBenFunny @RestlessN8iv

YouTube
https://t.co/JmiYMPJDSO