Hank “The Dude” Kirk-egaard

"I still sing the old songs", Proud Texan, Bed Pissing Champion ‘08 & ‘10

[Hank “The Dude” Kirk-egaard @RodJohnson22162]

All true hustlers clear their email after getting home from the bar #professionalism #timelyresponse

[Hank “The Dude” Kirk-egaard @RodJohnson22162]

Goyim lives matter

[Hank “The Dude” Kirk-egaard @RodJohnson22162]

Classic

[Hank “The Dude” Kirk-egaard @RodJohnson22162]

Ilhan Omar is hiding a small rodent in her cunt

[Hank “The Dude” Kirk-egaard @RodJohnson22162]

Change my mind:

Male orgasm > female orgasm

[Hank “The Dude” Kirk-egaard @RodJohnson22162]

I will not let the government shit on biscuits and tell me it’s gravy. I quite simply won’t.

[Josh “The Creamer” Heupel @BoollAssassin]

What happened to my beloved Dixie

[Hank “The Dude” Kirk-egaard @RodJohnson22162]

Muslim be like “Allah this” and “Allah that”.

And I’m just like, “How about you take allah that attitude back to the Middle East!”

[kana元气 @iluckykana]

性爱小技巧：帮女生舔胸教程 （胸的敏感度差很大，先试探，再加深。） 开始从女生躺着或跨坐、你从锁骨靠近开始。先不要含住乳头。手从腰侧滑到胸下缘托住，嘴先落在锁骨和乳房外侧，等她把胸往你脸上送，再进中间。 舔胸要爽，靠的是“先养敏、再含、再吸”，不是一上来又咬又拧。 第一阶段：先整只，不碰乳头（1分钟） 用唇贴着乳房外侧和胸下缘慢慢吻，舌面从下往上舔过皮肤，不停留在乳头上。手掌托住底部，拇指在外缘画慢圈，像把整只胸暖热�� 她开始挺胸、呼吸变深，或手按你后脑，再靠近乳晕。这一段禁止隔着衣服又掐又拧，也禁止两只手同时大力抓。 第二阶段：乳晕先于乳头 舌尖绕着乳晕画圈，由外到内，圈越画越小。唇贴上去含住乳晕，轻轻吮一下就松开，再换另一侧。乳头可以蹭到，但先不当主攻。 两侧要轮。一直含同一边，那边会麻、另一边会空。手在你没含的那一侧托着，指腹擦过乳晕边缘，保持两边都有感觉。 第三阶段：本套节奏——含、吮、舔、停 乳头充血变硬之后，才进入主节奏。一次只做一种，循环： 1含：把乳头连同乳晕含进嘴里，舌面贴住，停 2 秒 2吮：轻轻吸 3–4 下，力度像含住一颗软糖，不是吸奶到痛 3舔：吐到唇边，用舌尖点乳头顶端，或左右慢扫 4停：改吻胸上缘或锁骨 2–3 秒，让乳头接触空气 停很重要。一直吸，神经会钝，她也会从爽变成烦。停的那几秒里，用手指把刚离开的乳头按一下再���开，温差会把敏感送上去。 想加一点“欲”，可以在含住时让她看见你抬头看她，再慢慢松开，而不是埋着头狂吸。 第四阶段：手怎么配 嘴负责一侧，手负责另一侧，或手托住你正在含的那只： •指腹夹住乳头两侧，轻轻向外带一点，再松开，不要拧转 •掌心包住下缘往上托，让乳头更容易送进嘴里 •她喜欢压的，用掌根轻轻压住乳房往胸壁推，同时含住乳头 牙齿可以轻轻蹭，不能咬合。真想用牙，只允许用齿缘极轻地刮过乳晕，立刻改回唇。她一缩肩、一躲，当天就不再用牙。 第五阶段：和下面一起，才更容易整个人爽 舔胸单独也能有感觉，但多数女生要叠上下面才会过线。叠加时一次只加一件： •你含着乳头，手到阴蒂上点或画小圈 •她在上面骑，你抬头含住，她自己决定磨的速度 •手指在���面时，嘴里只做慢吮，不要两头同时加速 她快到时，含住不要换花样，吮的力度保持刚才她已经在送胸的那一档。忽然改成又咬又扯，容易把高潮打断。 怎么判断她是爽还是在忍 可以继续的信号：挺胸、手按你头、乳头明显变硬、呼吸变短、自己把另一侧也送过来。 该减的信号：缩肩、躲开、乳头被含住后整个人往后退、说麻了、说痛。麻了就换边或改用舌面贴着不动；痛了就回到吻外侧，当天不再吸那一侧。 有人乳头几乎不敏感，有人只碰一下就受不了。不敏感就不要死磕乳头，改舔胸下缘、腋下内侧和锁骨；极敏感就隔着湿润的唇含住，少用舌尖点。 实操注意 •润滑或唾液要保持湿，干舔和干拧都容易痛。 •两边轮流，含的时间单侧别太长。 •建议做 5–8 分钟作为前戏主段，或插入时当持续��景刺激，不要指望只靠舔胸替代所有事。 一句记住： 先养整只胸，再绕乳晕，再含乳头；吮要软，要会停，牙齿基本不用。

[Hank “The Dude” Kirk-egaard @RodJohnson22162]

What if the only way to freedom was to rape the master? What then?

[Jamarrius @YungxJayy]

“If you were a slave and I were your master, and the only way for you to be free was to strike a blow to kill me, what would you do?”

[Hank “The Dude” Kirk-egaard @RodJohnson22162]

Anyone ever fart around a dog and then feel bad bc the dog can prob smell it like 100 times worse?

[Hank “The Dude” Kirk-egaard @RodJohnson22162]

Billy Liucci (Italian) runs the college station mafia (Texags)

Elko will wake up with a bloody horse head in his bed tomorrow morning

[Hank “The Dude” Kirk-egaard @RodJohnson22162]

True American patriots do not plan on social security being solvent during their retirement

[Hank “The Dude” Kirk-egaard @RodJohnson22162]

We have an epidemic of Indian men with earrings #shrink

[Hank “The Dude” Kirk-egaard @RodJohnson22162]

Typing with 2 fingers in class is like wearing a diaper in public

[Hank “The Dude” Kirk-egaard @RodJohnson22162]

So mindraped by school I applied deodorant to my asshole

[Hank “The Dude” Kirk-egaard @RodJohnson22162]

Wisdom right here

[Hank “The Dude” Kirk-egaard @RodJohnson22162]

Italians play by a very different set of rules! I think it’s the chest hair.

[👻 Haunted Playboy 🎃 @AngloPlayboy_]

I'm of Anglo-Saxon, Scots-Irish, and Norse descent, so for me, watching The Sopranos is like watching an anthropology documentary about some sort of primitive hominid tribe

[👻 Haunted Playboy 🎃 @AngloPlayboy_]

I'm of Anglo-Saxon, Scots-Irish, and Norse descent, so for me, watching The Sopranos is like watching an anthropology documentary about some sort of primitive hominid tribe

[Hank “The Dude” Kirk-egaard @RodJohnson22162]

I will personally rape all rapists if necessary #tweet

[Hank “The Dude” Kirk-egaard @RodJohnson22162]

If frats are evil rape factories, why don’t women just avoid them? The whole premise seems like a ridiculous one to me.