Ron Swanson

You either like bacon or you're wrong. -- Ron Swanson #ParksandRec

[Ron Swanson @RonUSwanson]

I just ran into something called a "juggalo" and chased it for 2 blocks before it started crying. Is this something you can spray for?

[Ron Swanson @RonUSwanson]

Don't touch me there.

[Ron Swanson @RonUSwanson]

I'm never taking these off.

[Ron Swanson @RonUSwanson]

@redditstatus Turn if off and back on again, please.

[Ron Swanson @RonUSwanson]

@elonmusk Please go home.

[Ron Swanson @RonUSwanson]

You either like bacon or you're still wrong.

[Ron Swanson @RonUSwanson]

Let's get Right to Repair passed! https://t.co/PtMLuJA7CD

[Ron Swanson @RonUSwanson]

@shadmbrooks Plumbata acceptable for hand-to-hand combat? There's bacon at stake. There's also steak.

[Ron Swanson @RonUSwanson]

There are people all over the world saying things that I don't have to listen to...because this is America.

[Ron Swanson @RonUSwanson]

I absolutely do not want to solve a series of riddles and clues, each more intricate than the last.

You understand what I'm saying?

[Ron Swanson @RonUSwanson]

@cowboyjoe42 Not creepy at all!

[Ron Swanson @RonUSwanson]

I'm sorry I missed your message, Hailey. Loss is never easy. We're all random, but still family. Make good use of the time we have.

[Ron Swanson @RonUSwanson]

If we're gonna talk about our feelings, I'm gonna need a drink.

[Ron Swanson @RonUSwanson]

Food. I'm starving. I missed 2nd dinner and 1st snack. And 2nd snack and 3rd dinner.

[Ron Swanson @RonUSwanson]

The early bird can have the worm. I'll wait for bacon.

[Ron Swanson @RonUSwanson]

History began on July 4th, 1776. Everything before that was a mistake.

[Ron Swanson @RonUSwanson]

No.

[Ron Swanson @RonUSwanson]

If you catch falling food, it's yours. No questions asked.

[Ron Swanson @RonUSwanson]

The grass is rarely greener on the other side. Take care of your own grass.