Ron DeSantis Press Release (Parody)

DON’T CALL ME RICK OR ROB (Parody)

[Ron DeSantis Press Release (Parody) @Ron_Parody__]

@JDVance

[Ron DeSantis Press Release (Parody) @Ron_Parody__]

HEY @RepJeffries DO YOU LIKE MY NEW LOOK??

[Ron DeSantis Press Release (Parody) @Ron_Parody__]

LOOK IF IT’S ONE THING I KNOW IS SANDWICHES, ESPECIALLY ONES WITH MEATBALLS. DON’T WORRY I’VE TRIED EACH ONE THEY ARE SERVING AT ALCATRAZ! THEY ARE FRESH AND TASTY.

[Ron DeSantis Press Release (Parody) @Ron_Parody__]

NO ONE KNEW THIS, BUT IN THE ONE BIG BEAUTIFUL BILL IT FUNDS MY HIGH HEELED BOOTS! THANK YOU FOR PASSING IT!!!

[Ron DeSantis Press Release (Parody) @Ron_Parody__]

ELON SINCE YOU BROKE UP WITH TRUMP CAN YOU SUPPORT MY 2028 CAMPAIGN LIKE YOU DID IN 2024??😭😭PLEASE MY WIFE IS COUNTING ON IT!!

[Ron DeSantis Press Release (Parody) @Ron_Parody__]

IF YOU FEEL LIKE A JOKE SOMETIMES, ALWAYS REMEMBER THE BIGGEST JOKE OF ALL IS ME AND MY PRESIDENTIAL FLOP😭😭

[Ron DeSantis Press Release (Parody) @Ron_Parody__]

https://t.co/JMeEgouVRd

SOMEONE PLEASE LOOK THROUGH THIS LINK I NEED TO MAKE SURE MY WIFE WASN’T INVOLVED SHE’S CRAZY, BEFORE SHE MAKES A RUN FOR GOVERNOR😭

[Ron DeSantis Press Release (Parody) @Ron_Parody__]

SO IF I GET RID OF PROPERTY TAXES WILL YOU GUYS VOTE FOR ME IN 2028??

[Ron DeSantis Press Release (Parody) @Ron_Parody__]

@algoree_ YOU DON’T WANT TO KNOW THINK OF A KAREN EXECPT 10X WORSE PLUS ON ALCOHOL😭😭

[Ron DeSantis Press Release (Parody) @Ron_Parody__]

TRUMP PLEASE DEPORT MY WIFE WITH THE ILLEGALS I CAN’T TAKE HER ANYMORE😭

[Ron DeSantis Press Release (Parody) @Ron_Parody__]

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL OF MY SUPPORTERS THAT STILL HAVEN’T GOTTEN OVER OUR LOSS TONIGHT IS THE NIGHT TO DRINK AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE TO FORGET ABOUT ALL OF IT😭😭😭 DON’T WORRY I AM DOING IT TOO😭

[Ron DeSantis Press Release (Parody) @Ron_Parody__]

PLEASE TRUMP GIVE ME ONE LAST SHOT LET ME SECRETARY OF DEFENSE AND I WILL ADVANCE THE MILITARY WITH EXTRA LONG HIGH HEEL BOOTS! THIS WILL HELP THEM TO BE ABLE TO BE STYLISH, TALL AND COMFORTABLE AT THE SAME TIME! PLEASE😭😭😭

[Ron DeSantis Press Release (Parody) @Ron_Parody__]

THIS THANKSGIVING ME AND MY WIFE CASEY ARE THANKFUL THAT WE NO LONGER NEED TO ACT LIKE I’M TALL😭😭

[Ron DeSantis Press Release (Parody) @Ron_Parody__]

WELL TRUMP WON SO NOW I CAN’T SAY I WOULD HAVE WON😭😭😭 I AM HAVING A FULL ON MELTDOWN😭THE ONLY THING KEEPING ME GOING IS MY BOOTS

[Ron DeSantis Press Release (Parody) @Ron_Parody__]

WHO ARE YOU VOTING??

[Ron DeSantis Press Release (Parody) @Ron_Parody__]

IT’S ELECTION DAY IS ANYONE STILL WRITING IN MY NAME??😭😭

[Ron DeSantis Press Release (Parody) @Ron_Parody__]

@pride_pnw I HAVEN’T FULLY THOUGHT THAT THROUGH YET, I’LL PROBABLY TRY AND EAT SOME MEATBALLS TO GET OVER IT😭

[Ron DeSantis Press Release (Parody) @Ron_Parody__]

WITH 15 DAYS LEFT TO GO TILL ELECTION DAY I AM GETTING ALL OF MY COLLECTION OF BOOTS READY SO I CAN COPE WITH TRUMP WINNING😭😭

[Ron DeSantis Press Release (Parody) @Ron_Parody__]

THIS IS MY TIME TO TRY AND PROVE THAT I AM NOT A TOTAL IDIOT😭

[Ron DeSantis Press Release (Parody) @Ron_Parody__]

LOOK IF TOMORROW KAMALA DOES BETTER THAN I DID A YEAR AGO SHE MAY HAVE A SHOT😭���