no odien a ribbit, como persona evitativa que se guarda todo, es bueno que te presionen un poco para poder hablar, sino nunca vas a poder hacerlo con nadie y eso te va matando lentamente hasta que estás en un pozo muy difícil de salir. hablar nunca es malo, hablar salva vidas
@ttwrwqrrr EXACTLY!
Straight up, I wouldn't have grown or even had a partner of 5 years. If they didn't keep pushing me to be open and learn, I could trust them.
It was hard but worth it.
@peninachan That fine for a therapist. But friends dont really chat like that. A lot gets misunderstood because you wanna seem cool and caring. But still, you can still miss the full context. She had no clue that Jax would react like that after. And regardless, Jax refused to engage after.
Nah, as a person who has dealt with avoidant attachment issues. Its easy to feel like the moment YOU choose to be vulnerable. To instantly regret it cause some dick (normally family) teaches you that your feelings will be weaponized.
Ribbit literally just gave Jax space to talk.
Hot take: This is the moment I lost favor with Ribbit.
She told Jax something personal, then said it was her way of showing she trusted him. Then she asked if he trusted her.
That put him in an awkward, pressured position to open up before he was ready. He had already told her he was homeless, so clearly he was willing to share some things, just not everything.
The vibe is almost like someone undressing in front of you, saying, “This is me showing I trust you,” and then asking, “Do you trust me?” It creates this uncomfortable pressure for the other person to undress too, even if they weren’t ready for that kind of intimacy.
And then afterward, if they feel exposed, embarrassed, or ashamed, they might not want anyone else knowing that moment happened. Not because the intimacy meant nothing, but because they weren’t ready to be that vulnerable in the first place.
I’m not excusing Jax, but it does make it more understandable why he avoided Ribbit afterward, or why he thought she was prying to hold something over his head, just like his mother did. Just like his father did.
Not saying it’s all Ribbit’s fault, but if she wanted to share something personal with him, it shouldn’t have been used to get something personal from him in return.
When Jax asked, “What more do you need to know?” Ribbit should have left it there, or said something like, “Nothing. I trust you. That’s all you need to know.”
“Do you trust me?” creates an uncomfortable unspoken obligation for him to share something back. No wonder he freaked out afterward.
Mind you. She lied to her job a month later. Said I was hated crimed. Cause she was in jail for a couple of days for public intoxication and needed an excuse for why she missed work.
Might delete later.
But I related to Jax in that one scene.
Had a very similar experience when I first came out to my mom about my transness. And her reaction: "WhY aRE yOu TAkinG mY dAUgHtEr AwAy!?"
After years of hearing her be cool with queer folk. But just not her family.
Internalized Transphobia is the worst because like... You know you're trans. It's objectively real. And yet you might forever hate yourself and feel awkward connecting with others.
I feel for any trans kids who grew up in a conservative place. It's tough.