Queen Melody

Time changes things and life goes on. It's all you do to just try and keep up.

[TLM | Adult Melody| RP] #Herd

[Queen Melody @RoyallyDamned]

بغاليطق إلىفلورنس فتكبيرة ذاقئ

[Queen Melody @RoyallyDamned]

والاوراس تتضال رأهلنا بعدعا

[UP ALL NIGHT @neversleeps29]

i need my space unless your'e the right person then don't go anywhere

[Queen Melody @RoyallyDamned]

|| avi update

[UP ALL NIGHT @neversleeps29]

There are some people in my life I wish I had hugged a little longer.

[Queen Melody @RoyallyDamned]

@BirthrightPower —the person I eventually marry. I can’t let myself care. It has to be another business transaction.

[Queen Melody @RoyallyDamned]

@BirthrightPower Even with her out of the picture we can’t ever be together. No matter how much I wish. [Deciding to not drag it out any longer] At the next meeting with my advisors I’m going to allow them to begin with marriage arrangements. And as awful as it might sound I can’t care about —

[Queen Melody @RoyallyDamned]

@BirthrightPower [She let’s herself stay like this for a few moments more] As great as that sounds I can’t. Whether I want to or not I have to keep going. [Finally moving and putting space between them] As it is I’ve avoided doing what’s expected of me for too long now and I can’t anymore.

[Queen Melody @RoyallyDamned]

@BirthrightPower —trying. But even you can’t fix this one. Not unless you can make me numb so I can finally function.

[Laughing bitterly following her own words. As tempting as that sounded she only was half serious about that]

[Queen Melody @RoyallyDamned]

@BirthrightPower [She could try to deny it but being in his hood still had the same affect on her, even if she wouldn’t say it out loud. Burrowing her face into his shoulder she decides to allow herself this comfort even if just for a few moments]

You’re worth more than you think. I know you’re—

[Queen Melody @RoyallyDamned]

@BirthrightPower —I don’t know what to do anymore. And I hate feeling this all the time. I just don’t know anymore. [Quickly wiping her eyes to keep from letting tears out yet again]

[Queen Melody @RoyallyDamned]

@BirthrightPower [She wants so badly to be mad at him, to have him take the brunt of whatever she can muster just so she can get everything left in her out. But it wouldn’t be fair to him, not when all he wants is to make it better even if nothing could]

I’m so damn tired of being alone.—

[Queen Melody @RoyallyDamned]

@BirthrightPower —seem to control anymore]

The only shred of family I have are my mother’s sisters and they won’t speak to me. I told them the truth. I have nothing, no one left. [Saying it for the first time makes it really sink in, more than she expected it would] You don’t know how it is.

[Queen Melody @RoyallyDamned]

@BirthrightPower [His words cause her to pause before finally looking him in the eyes again for a few seconds] You understand? You know what it’s like to have everyone you love taken away from you and have to live with the fact that you’re left alone? [There’s malice in her words that she can’t—

[Queen Melody @RoyallyDamned]

@BirthrightPower —can see is his carrying her daughters limp body to her all over again and that was still too much to bare] I shouldn’t have said yes. The best outcome would’ve ended with my reputation ruined.

[Queen Melody @RoyallyDamned]

@BirthrightPower Don’t. [Grabbing tight to the sheets she has to force herself to not break down again. She was so damn tired of crying] You had nothing to lose. I had everything to lose.

[She still can’t bare to look at him so she keeps her eyes glued to the ground. If she looks at him all she—

[Queen Melody @RoyallyDamned]

@BirthrightPower —So how did you want it to end? We both knew it wouldn’t last, so how else was it going to end except in complete shit?

[She hates the words as soon as she said it] I’m sorry. I just… I don’t know.