Ruben310

My lesbian neighbors asked me what I wanted for my birthday. They gave me a Rolex. I think they misunderstood when I said I wanna watch.

[Ruben310 @Ruben310]

A guy is driving around Arkansas, and he sees a sign in front of a house: "Talking Dog For Sale." He rings the bell and the owner tells him the dog is in the backyard. The guy goes into the backyard and sees a Labrador retriever sitting there.

[Ruben310 @Ruben310]

@DoorDash this is sick. Makes me want to quit driving for you.

@DoorDash_Help @DoorDashImpact @AIatDoorDash

[Ruben310 @Ruben310]

World Cup 2026.

[Ruben310 @Ruben310]

@OccupyDemocrats

[Ruben310 @Ruben310]

Today is.....

[Ruben310 @Ruben310]

Join me on Chime and get $100. Terms apply. https://t.co/JaWA1mRnev

[Ruben310 @Ruben310]

"The only thing more powerful than hate is love."

[Ruben310 @Ruben310]

Let's be friends in Pokémon GO! My Trainer Code is 8787 8838 6676! 

#pokemon #pokemongo #PokemonGOfriends #pokemongofriendcode

[Ruben310 @Ruben310]

Let's be friends in Pokémon GO! My Trainer Code is 1658 8686 5759!

#pokemon #PokemonGOfriends #pokemongo #pokemongofriendcode

[Ruben310 @Ruben310]

@cryptofergani 15k

[Ruben310 @Ruben310]

Mom meatloaf

[MAGA Cult Slayer @MAGACult2]

Same vibe

[Ruben310 @Ruben310]

#CharlieKirk took a bullet for #Trump. Now the media will stop talking about the #EpsteinFiles

[Ruben310 @Ruben310]

Dude
@charliekirk11
#CharlieKirk

[Ruben310 @Ruben310]

Dude
@charliekirk11
#CharlieKirk

[Ruben310 @Ruben310]

Let's be friends in Pokémon GO! My Trainer Code is 8787 8838 6676! 

#pokemon #pokemongo #PokemonGOfriends #pokemongofriendcode

[Ruben310 @Ruben310]

Let's be friends in Pokémon GO! My Trainer Code is 1658 8686 5759!

#pokemon #PokemonGOfriends #pokemongo #pokemongofriendcode

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez @AOC]

Wow who would have thought that electing a rapist would have complicated the release of the Epstein Files?

[Doc  @DocAtCDI]

ICE officers stopped by our farm yesterday.

“We need to inspect your property for illegal aliens,” one of them said.

I replied, “Alright, but whatever you do, don’t go into that field over there.”

The officer in charge exploded.

“Mister, I have the authority of the federal government behind me!” he barked, reaching into his back pocket. He yanked out a badge and shoved it in my face.

“See this fucking badge? This badge means I can go wherever I want on ANY land. No questions asked, no answers given. Am I clear? Do you understand?”

I nodded politely and said, “Be my guest.”

Then I went back to my chores.

About ten minutes later, I heard screaming. I looked up and saw six ICE agents running for their lives, being chased by my big, mean, old bull. And with every step, that bull was closing in. Fast.

It looked like they were about to get gored for sure.

So I dropped my tools, ran over to the fence, and shouted at the top of my lungs:

“YOUR BADGE! SHOW HIM YOUR FUCKING BADGE!”

[Rep. Eric Swalwell @RepSwalwell]

This meme is everywhere.
Let’s be kinder to each other. Making fun of an almost-80-year-old falling on the stairs has no place in our politics.

[MAGA Cult Slayer @MAGACult2]

“They used us.” #FAFO

[Ruben310 @Ruben310]

@realDonaldTrump "You're not the president, you need to go away.
I want you to shush your mouth up."

[Xaniken @Xaniken]

dont come to the ball pit tomorrow