ZachRudy

A lot immature.

[moose 🐦‍🔥 @usermooseontwt]

Does matter how old you are. Cant be clapping your hands then get your ankles broke like that

[Penicio Del Toro @MaggotActor69]

The children are born with an innate knowledge of Master Shake

[im berry🫐 @berry_gatherer]

Some shit Sweet Dee Reynolds would post as an acting reel if she got TikTok

[l feII in Dior @LIRIO_AG]

“Ay no, tarjeta gris otra vez”.

[josh @joshypooper]

blastoise but instead of water it's diarrhea and his names asstoise

[penny @xXMeatGodXx]

are you wiping what im shitting?

[ya boy pablo sanchez @yaboypabIo]

ngl i was faded lmao

[NOBUNAGA🇯🇵🏯_夏樹蒼依 @japan_nobunaga]

Stateside, a gas station. I drank a frozen blue beverage too quickly, and was struck down by a punishment this entire nation knows, and accepts, and has named.

The drink is called a slush. Ice, sweetness, and a blue that does not occur in nature. The day was hot. I was thirsty. I drank like a soldier at a river.

The pain arrived in my skull like a war horn.

Behind the eyes. Above everything. Total. I gripped the roof of my car. I may have made a sound.

"Brain freeze," said the cashier through the door, with no urgency whatsoever.

It has a NAME. The affliction is so common it has a household name, like a cousin.

"Tongue on the roof of your mouth," called a man at the pumps. He did not look over. He prescribed the remedy mid-pump, casually, the way one mentions weather.

I pressed my tongue to the roof of my mouth. The war horn faded. The healer nodded at his pump, finished, and was gone in a Chevrolet.

In my land, punishment follows crime by way of courts and seasons. Here, the sentence is instant. Drink with greed, and the ice strikes the mind directly. No trial. No appeal. Perfectly fair.

And here is what moves me. EVERYONE has felt it. The cashier. The healer. Children. Elders. An entire nation united by the same small lightning, all taught the same cure, all passing it on to strangers at gas stations, free of charge.

You cannot fully distrust a country once you know it shares one pain.

The freeze does not punish thirst. It punishes haste.

I finished the slush slowly, like a scholar. Blue tongue. Clear mind.

Then at the door I forgot everything, drank deeply, and was struck down again.

"Tongue, hon," said the cashier, without looking up.

Discipline is a journey.

[sɪʟᴇɴᴛ @wydsilent]

“here comes the tickle monster” ahh stance

[NOBUNAGA🇯🇵🏯_夏樹蒼依 @japan_nobunaga]

USA. A Mexican restaurant. We had not yet ordered anything, and the food was already arriving.

Chips. Salsa. Unrequested. Free.

I stopped the waiter. "We have not earned these."

"They just come with the table, man."

They come with the TABLE. In my land, hospitality is a debt. Every gift creates an obligation, weighed carefully, returned in the proper season with interest of feeling. Here, the gift arrives before you have even proven you can pay for dinner.

This is not an appetizer. This is a declaration: we trust you. Eat.

I ate with the gravity the moment deserved. And then — I must report this calmly — the basket emptied, and a new one appeared.

"Did we…?"

"Refill," the waiter said. "It's bottomless."

Bottomless. They have wells of salsa. The supply lines of this nation are beyond anything my ancestors imagined.

My friend warned me. "Don't fill up on chips, dude."

Too late. I had accepted three baskets. Honor demanded each one be finished — an unfinished gift is an insult. By the time my actual food arrived, I was a ruined man.

I was not hungry. I was not comfortable. I had been defeated by a courtesy.

Generosity that arrives before the request cannot be repaid. It can only be survived.

I know the rule now. I have made my peace with the basket. One basket. Two at the most.

Who am I deceiving. There is no number of baskets I would refuse. The trust of a nation is in that salsa, and I intend to honor all of it.

[SportsCenter @SportsCenter]

WORLD RECORD IN NCAA CHAMPIONSHIP PRELIMS 🤯

Ja'Kobe Tharp ran a 12.75 in the 110M hurdles to set a new world record!

[mr_eggs 🇵🇸 @scrumble_eggs]

I hope Tim is having a good pride month.

[God @TheTweetOfGod]

I loan it out in June.

[matt @mattybtweets69]

Had a few nights like this

[Stella @StellaaSports]

Imagine never getting harmed in your entire life and the first hit you experience is a CTE inducing kick

[Tap Sackson MD (Don Keydik) @TapJackson5]

I’ve been holding onto to this for a long time. I always knew.

[️s @big_sam_atari]

"Forgive me, Father, for I have dripped."

[Pamela🇵🇹 @PamelaNjoku2]

Why are people like this 😂😭

[𝐟𝐞𝐝𝐞𝐯𝐚𝐥𝐯 @heis_fede]

Pepe finding out that you’re allowed to fight in the Real Madrid dressing room after he retired

[maria ˃ 𖥦 ˂(dms for skin removal only) @90smiau]

and for the lady, perhaps jazz hands?