Rupert B. Grant

Father. Julie’s husband. Ex-dentist. Empiricist. #CCFC

[Rupert B. Grant @RupertBGrant]

starting to come to terms with the fact this whole twitter thing is something to be ashamed of.

[Rupert B. Grant @RupertBGrant]

Thank you em rata and Nick Mullen for saving America

[Rupert B. Grant @RupertBGrant]

Gaffer telling me today how much his dad loved the war and I should strive to do the same when I’m sent off to ww3

[Rupert B. Grant @RupertBGrant]

@stoptapdancing Ostrich egg would be baller !!

[Rupert B. Grant @RupertBGrant]

Just got applauded as a “player” by Jamie Laing. Pyrrhic victory for rupertnation.

[Rupert B. Grant @RupertBGrant]

music, man… it’s such a miracle.

https://t.co/wRDzUS9UMI

[Rupert B. Grant @RupertBGrant]

Adobe acrobat can suck my nuts

[Rupert B. Grant @RupertBGrant]

Bartender last night telling me the lass they’re chatting to is currently in late state auditions for “lesbian love island”. What a wonderful world full of curious tales.

[Rupert B. Grant @RupertBGrant]

Flirt with your local barista milf and god will be kind ☀️🌈

[Rupert B. Grant @RupertBGrant]

Only my groomer has remembered my birthday. They are really working for that molestation.

[Rupert B. Grant @RupertBGrant]

@Spinal_Sap The Yankee mcmansion cannot compute wood chip walls

[Rupert B. Grant @RupertBGrant]

3 beers final key change in Disco 2000 hours

[Rupert B. Grant @RupertBGrant]

*fridge. Please excuse typo. Turns out I had drank my own beer.

[Rupert B. Grant @RupertBGrant]

Whoever drank my fucking fringe beer i will tear you limb from limb. On the day of Brian Wilson’s passing no less.

[Rupert B. Grant @RupertBGrant]

Boss is deeply suspicious I have an eating disorder and keeps making passing comments. Sorry my waist is nowhere to be found etc.

[Rupert B. Grant @RupertBGrant]

Listening to Cohen and flaunting my evening plans

[Rupert B. Grant @RupertBGrant]

The idea I have to keep eating till I die is seriously so baffling to me. I’ve had enough. It’s too expensive and I’ve done it all. “Oh you’ve got to try Mr Cumbo’s restaurant I’ve been on the waiting list for months”. Fuck off.

[Rupert B. Grant @RupertBGrant]

Friends return from trip to the old uni. They reveal current students talk of a mythic scholar who thought julian of Norwich was a man in their final exam.

Well of course I know him - he’s me.

[Rupert B. Grant @RupertBGrant]

Had a shower it’s calm

[Rupert B. Grant @RupertBGrant]

Just received the worst haircut of my life and have 3 1st dates booked in for the next 6 days fucking kill me. God has struck me down

[Rupert B. Grant @RupertBGrant]

Just received the worst haircut of my life and have 3 1st dates booked in for the next 6 days fucking kill me. God has struck me down

[Rupert B. Grant @RupertBGrant]

@Spinal_Sap Only the K man 🐐