Rusted Revolver

''Forgive an old man his wanderings, if you would. Minds are like swords, I do fear. The old ones go to RUST. Ah, and here is our milk.''

[Rusted Revolver @Rusted0Revolver]

@Kingsford have you considered selling Kingsford charcoal toothpaste?

It'd be funny and I'd buy it.

[Rusted Revolver @Rusted0Revolver]

So many inappropriate jokes here... for duck's sake.

[Tammy Duckworth @SenDuckworth]

Today is the 20th anniversary of my Alive Day, the day I almost died in a dusty field in Iraq after our Blackhawk was shot out of the sky—but didn’t.

[Rusted Revolver @Rusted0Revolver]

She judges a man's worth on physical appearance and wealth.

Then disparaged a woman who desired virtue in a potential partner.

Also, I'm 6'2. I was a horrible husband. Almost as bad as my ex was a wife. You are a fool if you think height makes a difference.

[BellaliberTea @bellaliberteaa]

My brother in law

6’2
Fireman
Home owner
5% body fat

2024 first time voter went on a date last night with some crunchy granola hippie. She asked if he had voted and for whom and when he said Trump she called an Uber and left 💀

Natural selection at play.

[Rusted Revolver @Rusted0Revolver]

@summerforever21 @NJAmy213 It is.

You can find me here

https://t.co/HNqE2M3vHl

[Rusted Revolver @Rusted0Revolver]

@Kiss_meImPolish @PVBrett The equator is confusing.

[Rusted Revolver @Rusted0Revolver]

This is the sad truth about what women are faced with in their professional careers. When I was a CPA, the partner I worked for was a true leader. She was strict but fair. If she was a man, she would have been praised. Instead, many staff called her a "c*nt".

[𝚑𝚊𝚗𝚗𝚊𝚑 𝚐𝚛𝚒𝚏𝚏 @yeahrightgirlhg]

I’ll gladly vote for the first woman president when they give us a woman who is a not a dumb cunt

[Rusted Revolver @Rusted0Revolver]

I haven't seen a single tweet or news article claiming the election was rigged. Of course, I don't waste my time reading everything, so I'm sure there are a few.

But I was under the impression that comedians had a decent sense of "the funniest thing."

She's attacking a strawman

[Roseanne Barr @therealroseanne]

The funniest thing I’m seeing is Dems saying the election was rigged because there was huge turnout last night and there are 20 million less votes for Kamala. lol.

They still think Biden got 81 million votes at 4 am. Trump is the most popular candidate of all time. He won three elections- two handedly in a row.

[Rusted Revolver @Rusted0Revolver]

@TheBearHeir Michigan voted 👍

[Rusted Revolver @Rusted0Revolver]

@Blanch344 They should make "I Voted" stickers in reverse so that selfies are more accurate.

[Rusted Revolver @Rusted0Revolver]

I am not claiming fraud, merely negligence at my precinct, and I doubt it's an isolated event.

[Rusted Revolver @Rusted0Revolver]

As you vote today, be vigilant. I had to "remind" an election volunteer to sign an affidavit that I had not mailed in my absteen ballot after they had called and confirmed. If they hadn't signed it, my vote would have been discarded.

I had let slip I was voting straight Dem.

[Rusted Revolver @Rusted0Revolver]

In front of me in line, a student drove from Notre Dame to Grand Rapids to drop off his absteen ballot since it wouldn't arrive in time via mail. None of the volunteers suggested he drop it off at the clerk's drop box. I told him he could while the volunteers told him he couldn't

[Rusted Revolver @Rusted0Revolver]

At a dog bar playing BINGO, an elderly lesbian couple dressed as Mario and Luigi just hit BINGO at the same time.

It's a Halloween miracle!

(Their dog is dressed as Bowser)

[Rusted Revolver @Rusted0Revolver]

@guygavrielkay Actually. How about "flour to a cake"?

[Rusted Revolver @Rusted0Revolver]

@guygavrielkay This is a great question. I don't know of an equivalent. Perhaps grapes to France?

I just made that up so it's not an equivalent.

[Rusted Revolver @Rusted0Revolver]

@summerforever21 @Matt_Pinner The

[Rusted Revolver @Rusted0Revolver]

My brother and I looking at the Illinois fan sitting next to us. #GoBlue

[Rusted Revolver @Rusted0Revolver]

Thank you Tigers for an incredible season! Go Lions! Honolulu Blue for the win!

[Rusted Revolver @Rusted0Revolver]

Imagine reading an entire book about the TSA.

[Coleman Hughes @coldxman]

Imagine writing an entire book about the TSA––a book that ultimately condemns it––without mentioning 9/11, or in fact, the entire phenomenon of airplane hijacking.

That is what Coates has done, in a nutshell. The fact that he did it with characteristically nice prose hardly excuses it. If it's not worth doing, it's not worth doing well.

[Rusted Revolver @Rusted0Revolver]

I'm watching Die Hard for the first time. This is most definitely a Christmas movie.

"Now I have a machine gun. Ho ho ho."

🤣