DIRTY OLD SNAKE.

isolation! trepidation ー !
ᅠdon't fear nothing!
ᅠᅠsnake is bluffing!
whips his tail ー sends you running.

[DIRTY OLD SNAKE. @SAFESQUEEZER]

❛ future, he don't try to find me ー
ᅠᅠskin i've been through dies behind me.

➢ ind. MR. SNAKE from the bad guys.
➢ #dreamworksrp / #disneyrp / #mvrp

[DIRTY OLD SNAKE. @SAFESQUEEZER]

→

if he had feet, he'd be on the back one. )

❛ just 'snake' is fine. i'm uh, here on behalf of governor foxington, 'pparently the two of you've been in talks recently?

( he sounds like he's practiced being polite. straightening up, he fixes his hat & collar with his tail. )

[DIRTY OLD SNAKE. @SAFESQUEEZER]

( the ignored phone call, the look on the wolf's face, & especially the wrong name he gets called don't inspire confidence. snake is certainly rattled ー not AFRAID, he's tangoed with much bigger & badder than jimmy crystal without even flinching, but definitely at a loss.

→

[ᅠᅠᅠ… 𝑻𝑯𝑬ᅠ𝑪͟𝚁𝒊𝑻𝒊͟𝑸𝚄𝖊͟. @0FJUDGEMENT]

ᅠ
ᅠ

ᅠ 𝓽he wolf seemed
abstracted.
a paw sought a
vibration in his
pocket that he
let go upon the
other’s hawking.

ᅠ

[DIRTY OLD SNAKE. @SAFESQUEEZER]

→

to give his tail something to do, he idly swishes the booze around in its glass. )

❛ i mean, heyー you can relate, right pal? nobody's HAPPY to see you. no offense or anythin'. but... fuck, more'n fifty years of everybody treating you like a monster really wears you down.

[DIRTY OLD SNAKE. @SAFESQUEEZER]

( ... shit. that tracks, he's not sure why he thought he could get anything past death. snake swallows thickly, & sighs, & turns back to the drink in front of him, taking a deep sip. )

❛ guess i was just tired of bein' hated.

( his mutter is uncharacteristically soft.

→

[𝐃𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐇 .ᐟ @IobodeIamuerte]

[ it'd be surprising how many times death has sat down to speak to assholes .

they're always the interesting ones . ]

.. such a change in your life . be honest , serpent . 𝐰𝐡𝐲 .

[DIRTY OLD SNAKE. @SAFESQUEEZER]

❛ shitー

( he wasn't expecting it to poof into existence onto his head, making him wriggle & splutter until he wrangles the shirt onto the tip of his tail. like a hanger. )

❛ hey, alright. that's exactly what i was thinkin' of, that's pretty impressive.

[「 Figment 」 @OurLittleSpark]

He tries to see what he’s thinking of…

And so, the same shirt he was thinking in his head would now fall right onto his head, fulfilling his needs!

“There we go!”

[DIRTY OLD SNAKE. @SAFESQUEEZER]

( there we go, it comes back around in the end. snake's brief confusion settles into self-satisfied smugness. )

❛ ah-hah. & rabbits are just as cute li'l bundles of joy as guinea pigs are, so if we're gonna be good guys, those're off-limits to both of us. agreed?

[DIRTY OLD SNAKE. @SAFESQUEEZER]

( snake has the distinct feeling that he shouldn't be here, but apparently, this is part of the 'good guy' rebrand ー doing LEGITIMATE business, with legitimate businesspeople. uncomfortably, he watches a couple of paces back & forth.

then clears his throat, loudly. )

[ᅠᅠᅠ… 𝑻𝑯𝑬ᅠ𝑪͟𝚁𝒊𝑻𝒊͟𝑸𝚄𝖊͟. @0FJUDGEMENT]

ᅠ
ᅠ
ᅠ
ᅠ * 𝓹acing the 𝑻𝑳 .
ᅠ
ᅠ
ᅠ

[DIRTY OLD SNAKE. @SAFESQUEEZER]

❛ well, there you go. that's close enough.

... hang on, what were we talkin' about?

[DIRTY OLD SNAKE. @SAFESQUEEZER]

❛ yup. got a special li'l lady at home, one who's actually got feet, who'd look great in those.

( he has no such thing. he's going to immediately flip them for a profit. )

[MOVED . @PURRGLR]

“ i’m surprised that you can even laugh .

why , are you actually interested in them ? or got someone special to gift ? ”

[DIRTY OLD SNAKE. @SAFESQUEEZER]

❛ ha ha. look, you got a laugh outta me, good job.

... how much do those cost? just for my own information.

[MOVED . @PURRGLR]

“ perhaps . ”

[DIRTY OLD SNAKE. @SAFESQUEEZER]

❛ ... 's this your definition of humour?

[MOVED . @PURRGLR]

here !

the reader should try these on .

[DIRTY OLD SNAKE. @SAFESQUEEZER]

❛ you're right. i don't.

( now he does turn his head to look at death ー not in the eyes ー with one eyebrow slightly arched. since when does the grim reaper stop by to sit & chat?

& with an asshole like him, of all people? )

❛ but, hey, i'll hear you out. let's talk, then.

[𝐃𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐇 .ᐟ @IobodeIamuerte]

[ something in death resonates with his words , snake & him share a common balance line . old with a touch of grump . ]

oh , i'm 𝘴𝘶𝘳𝘦 it was for his sake .

[ pursing lips & nodding ... ;

[DIRTY OLD SNAKE. @SAFESQUEEZER]

❛ lemme see... try this one on for size.

( he can't help it ー the dragon's instant smile & eagerness to help are really endearing. snake closes his eyes, & holds in his mind the clearest image he canー

of a REALLY NICE aloha shirt he saw in a shop window one time. )

[「 Figment 」 @OurLittleSpark]

“…?!”

After that, the small dragon would quickly smile again, all excited once more after being offered to bring a little something!

“Mhm!”

[DIRTY OLD SNAKE. @SAFESQUEEZER]

( sounds a lot like mr. wolf, to him. maybe a bad guy CAN be a good guy too, after all... )

[DIRTY OLD SNAKE. @SAFESQUEEZER]

❛ well hey, your robin hood sounds like a pretty stand-up guy, in that case.

[DIRTY OLD SNAKE. @SAFESQUEEZER]

❛ sure is, a damn shame. me & all the guys i run with, we're all pretty bottom of the barrel types ー they used to call us 'the bad guys' 'cause they thought we couldn't do any right ー so i've done some stealin' from the rich in my day. lemme tell you, it's satisfying.

[DIRTY OLD SNAKE. @SAFESQUEEZER]

❛ ... wolf. those are meat. that makes you a carnivore.

okay okay okay ー if someone COOKED a rabbit, just a regular dumb rabbit hoppin' around on four legs. in a stew or somethin'. you'd eat that, right?

[DIRTY OLD SNAKE. @SAFESQUEEZER]

❛ hey, you got there. a for effort.

[DIRTY OLD SNAKE. @SAFESQUEEZER]

❛ fuck yeah. hit it.

[DIRTY OLD SNAKE. @SAFESQUEEZER]

❛ co-signed. rich people are dicks, & you'd have to be a real asshole to steal from the less fortunate ー uh, pardon my language, ma'am.

... 'sides, their stuff isn't nearly as nice. ( he's kidding. )