Super Earth Strategic Command

Broadcast channel for Super Earth Strategic Command. Stand by for signal transmission.

[Super Earth Strategic Command @SEStratCom]

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Esker, Estanu, Pandion-XXIV. Keep them bug-free for the next 5 days. As of the time of this transmission, only Pandion-XXIV crawls.

While you're at it, kill 750m bugs, and 5m of their titanic, stupid-looking babysitters.

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#Helldivers2

[Super Earth Strategic Command @SEStratCom]

@YirbyV That was sarcasm.

[Super Earth Strategic Command @SEStratCom]

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Curia and Trash are under siege by Automatons. Curia is Priority One, as she stands guard for Super Earth herself. Trash will have to hold out for now. Spill oil, Helldivers!

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#Helldivers2

[Super Earth Strategic Command @SEStratCom]

@YirbyV Curia is held, Aesir Pass, not so much.

[Super Earth Strategic Command @SEStratCom]

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There has been a lot of talk at high command, and they aren't happy. The toasters think they're smart appliances now, and are pushing deep into our territory. Hold Curia, and take Aesir Pass. No time to screw around.

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#Helldivers2

[Super Earth Strategic Command @SEStratCom]

@MrBlueFyreTV @VetziL34907 Not for long.

[Super Earth Strategic Command @SEStratCom]

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If the bots or the 'nids had cheeks, they'd be clapped out right now. Toaster resistance: dismantled. Roach incursions: quashed. Drink that Liber-tea iced or hot, Helldiver, you earned it.

Stand by for new orders.

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#Helldivers2

[Super Earth Strategic Command @SEStratCom]

@VetziL34907 Who doesn't love watching the sparkle of our enemy's atoms vaporizing across the artificial sunset of a several mega-Liberties worth of Democracy packed into a sleek, phallic, Capitalism-powered weapon of war?

Brings a tear to our eyes.

[Super Earth Strategic Command @SEStratCom]

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With the toasters in retreat and the Trigon sector secured, it's time for pest control. Estanu is under attack. Go to its defense. We're getting tired of bailing it out of trouble. Erata Prime can hold on until then.

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#Helldivers2

[Super Earth Strategic Command @SEStratCom]

@StacheAttackS @ChoutzLAN Super Earth Strategic Command approves of this message.

[Super Earth Strategic Command @SEStratCom]

@NolletsThe @VetziL34907 SOMEONE PROMOTE THIS DIVER!

[Super Earth Strategic Command @SEStratCom]

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The assault on Bore Rock is underway, however the bugs have once again attacked Soccoro III. All efforts should be made to capture Bore Rock before our operational window closes. Less than 22hrs, Helldivers.

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#Helldivers2

[Super Earth Strategic Command @SEStratCom]

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We take our standard 48h/yr leave and things goes to shit.

Of the two planets where resistance fighters are holding out in Bot space, only Troost remains. Apply liberal democracy!

The forever war on Crimsica continues.

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#Helldivers2

[Super Earth Strategic Command @SEStratCom]

@VetziL34907 @NolletsThe We can neither confirm nor deny the existence of, return of, the seemingly targeted, interplanetary, pinpoint accurate plasma projectile fire of, any intelligent alien species we may or may not have fought in the past.

[Super Earth Strategic Command @SEStratCom]

@VetziL34907 @NolletsThe This is two days old. Thank you for noticing.

[Super Earth Strategic Command @SEStratCom]

@NolletsThe So you feel better now?

[Super Earth Strategic Command @SEStratCom]

@NolletsThe Do your job. Follow orders. It's not about the Bugdivers and their inane, ridiculous, liberty-hating ways. Kill some goddamn bugs in the name of Super Earth.

[Super Earth Strategic Command @SEStratCom]

@NolletsThe Undemocratic.