caesar gibbs

[caesar gibbs @SIKANI]

http://t.co/vI6GxQc9lm In 2011 it is more normal to have 0 or 2 dads than 1 dad

[caesar gibbs @SIKANI]

I don't call it lying down, I call it landscape mode. http://t.co/zGFcPWbYZ2

[caesar gibbs @SIKANI]

http://t.co/fmWqJHIffq The Hamburglar burgled HAM. If he stole burgers, he'd be called the Hamburgerburglar.

[caesar gibbs @SIKANI]

Uh oh. My car's GPS asked me, "Who's Siri?" http://t.co/6OGXuM2zq6

[caesar gibbs @SIKANI]

http://t.co/FBOkNetA6Y Thursday is "date night", when I force my family to eat all the expired food in our fridge.

[caesar gibbs @SIKANI]

http://t.co/2PzTj8rGg2 A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feels so good.

[caesar gibbs @SIKANI]

My stepladder is so great, I'm almost glad my ladders got divorced. http://t.co/EoidwuU9ST

[caesar gibbs @SIKANI]

http://t.co/hSSqWzyv2d In Hidden Valley, childhood obesity is covered up in creamy ranch dressing.

[caesar gibbs @SIKANI]

http://t.co/JkZDTwNS3R Do hipster chicks wear sweatpants that say "DRY" on the butt?

[caesar gibbs @SIKANI]

I wish I lived in the 1950's, because I have a few songs I want to record about my postman. http://t.co/RfYbnNgApw

[caesar gibbs @SIKANI]

http://t.co/t4FvShJt2Y If you have more than zero bumper stickers on your car you have too many.

[caesar gibbs @SIKANI]

http://t.co/3ocfMEkU9D "It's not you, it's me. " - twins looking at family photos

[caesar gibbs @SIKANI]

Dad: i don't know why you wear a bra-you've got nothing to put in it. MUM: you wear pants don't you? http://t.co/pI2p5QafqH

[caesar gibbs @SIKANI]

Twitter can be like talking to crazy homeless people through protective glass. http://t.co/F9kRdeJQbY

[caesar gibbs @SIKANI]

My cousins baby child keeps pointing at me and saying 'cat' http://t.co/vhS9jgS6

[caesar gibbs @SIKANI]

http://t.co/rZwAKzWo The weirder Rihanna's tattoos get the less I blame Chris Brown.

[caesar gibbs @SIKANI]

A homeless guy asked me for 50 cents for a sandwich. I said, "First let me see the sandwich." http://t.co/Cy8d0Qmh

[caesar gibbs @SIKANI]

Dear Apple, Sorry to hear that you're still figuring out how cell phones work. http://t.co/gR5EApxt

[caesar gibbs @SIKANI]

I'm writin a short story for a magazine column.There's this character that is about to die and I'm trying my best to save her but ....