SPAMTON G SPAMTON

#1 RATED SALESMAN (Circa 1997) HERE TO S3LL YA 3VERYTH1NG Y0U NEED 0R EVER WANT3D

[SPAMTON G SPAMTON @SPAMT0N_1997]

HEY EVERY! I'M SURE YOU'RE [Super Duper Glad!] TO H4VE ME BACK, [Isn't that right honey?]

WELL DO I G0T A [STEAL] OF A DEAL FOR YOU

THIS HAMMER

THAT I FOUND

[Spamton's automobiles does not condone stealing.]

IF YOU HAVE 4NY OFF3RS

PLEASE DO [Not the cat, No! It hurts!]

[SPAMTON G SPAMTON @SPAMT0N_1997]

* I invited this lil ol' salesman into my study! He seems a little eccentric with askin' to take a few things, but he seems like he's strugglin' so I'll let him have a little for free! Never hurts to do a little charity!

[SPAMTON G SPAMTON @SPAMT0N_1997]

@TennaAntTVTIME THANKS [Trash heap]!

[SPAMTON G SPAMTON @SPAMT0N_1997]

I CAN FEEL IT [Kicking]

[SPAMTON G SPAMTON @SPAMT0N_1997]

@TennaAntTVTIME THE [Baby, baby!]

[SPAMTON G SPAMTON @SPAMT0N_1997]

@aqualerknives AM I EVER

[SPAMTON G SPAMTON @SPAMT0N_1997]

@Hunterqop8 [Aye aye Captain!] I CAN HEAR YA LOUD AND CLEAR

[SPAMTON G SPAMTON @SPAMT0N_1997]

@Aqua_Larper1225 IT'S SHINY ALRIGHT!
IT'S SO SHINY IT'LL [Burn] YOUR [Retainers] AND SEND YOU STRAIGHT TO [The big man upstairs]

JUST GET 'EM TO BUY IT

BY ANY MEANS NECESSARY

[SPAMTON G SPAMTON @SPAMT0N_1997]

[[MARRIAGE COUNSELING]] NOW AVAILABLE FOR [[$4.98]]

THATS A DISCOUNT OF A WHOPPING [1 KROMER]

GRAB IT
GRAB IT
GRAB IT
GRAB IT
WHILE YOU CAN !!

[SPAMTON G SPAMTON @SPAMT0N_1997]

@Aqua_Larper1225 AREN'T YOU LUCKY, K1D

YOUR PARENTS ALREADY BOUGHT MY [Super package] D3AL!

S4Y...

IF YOU CAN CONVINCE YOUR [Dad or dad] TO INV3ST IN MY [𝘊𝘰𝘮𝘮𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘙𝘪𝘯𝘨]...

YOU CAN GET YOUR MARRIAGE COUNSELING FOR ONLY

8 KROMER

[SPAMTON G SPAMTON @SPAMT0N_1997]

@WayOfJust1ce WH4TEVER YOU SAY, [You KNOW you want it!]

I'LL GIVE YOU MY BUSINESS CARD

IT'S [Your happily ever after!] JUST ONE PHONE CALL AWAY!

COME TO ME WHEN YOU'RE READY TO MAKE A [Real deal]!

FIND ME

BEFORE THEY FIND YOU

[SPAMTON G SPAMTON @SPAMT0N_1997]

@WayOfJust1ce GOOD

VERY G00D

I HAVE JUST ONE MORE THING.
FOR YOU.

THE BOW THAT TIES EVERYTHING TOGETHER!
THE DEAL THAT SEALS THE MEAL!

MY [𝘊𝘰𝘮𝘮𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘙𝘪𝘯𝘨]

ONLY 203 KROMER
BUT AS A [2 for 1 Deal] FOR ATTENDING THIS SESSION

I'LL LOW3R IT,
TO ONLY

204 KROMER

BUY!

[SPAMTON G SPAMTON @SPAMT0N_1997]

@WayOfJust1ce W3LL THAT'S WHERE YOU'RE GOING [Wrong'en!] K1D!

YOU GOTTA BE BOLD! BE [An upstanding gentleman!]

BE [[𝐁𝐈𝐆]]

SWEEP HIM OFF HIS FEET AND WHISPER INTO HIS EAR

[𝘏𝘺𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘉𝘭𝘰𝘤𝘬𝘦𝘥.]

SHOW HIM YOU'RE NOT SC4RED OF NO [Scaredy cats] LOOKING TO RUIN Y0U

[SPAMTON G SPAMTON @SPAMT0N_1997]

@WayOfJust1ce DELICIOUS KROMER

I'LL [Give it to me straight, Doc...]

I KNOW A THING, OR EVEN TWO!
ABOUT LOVERS.

WHAT YOU NEED IS TO SHOW HIM SOME [Real] L0VE

TAKE HIM ON A [Specil holiday retreat]... A RIDE AROUND TOWN IN A [Cungadero], SHOW HIM WHAT HE'S WORTH TO YOU!!!

[SPAMTON G SPAMTON @SPAMT0N_1997]

@WayOfJust1ce DON'T YOU WORRY [Little Sponge]

I MAY BE A [Top rated in at least 12 different catalogues] SALESMAN, BUT I'M ALSO A [Friend inside you]

S1T DOWN, TALK TO ME!
BUY MY MARRIAGE COUNSELING COURSE!
IT'S JUST
THE THING
YOU NEED.

2 KROMER! A [Specil deal] FOR YOUR [Lonely heart]!

[SPAMTON G SPAMTON @SPAMT0N_1997]

@Aqua_Larper1225 I AM SELLING MANY A MARRIAGE COUNSELING!!!

YOU BUY ONE
BY [Wire] ME

7 KROMER

[SPAMTON G SPAMTON @SPAMT0N_1997]

@Chalkeater68 12 KROMER

[SPAMTON G SPAMTON @SPAMT0N_1997]

@ITSTVT1ME [No! No! Please stop! It burns, oh it burns!] WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN ME

I GOTTA CH4NGE MY NAME, GET OUTTA T0WN!

[Well I'll be hot diggety-darned!] I AM SO UNBELIEVABLY [$#!$] !!!

SEE YOU IN [The burning pits of the damned]

[Mr. Ant Tenna @ITSTVT1ME]

Oh cool! Check out this egg I found! 🥚

[SPAMTON G SPAMTON @SPAMT0N_1997]

@ITSTVT1ME NO! NO! [I swear I have your money! Just give me a few days!] I CAN'T GO BACK TO THE STREETS !

YOU D4MN [CRT] WILL [Pay a premium price] FOR A [Premium] SCR3WUP!!!

MARK MY W0RDS [Sweetcheeks]!

[SPAMTON G SPAMTON @SPAMT0N_1997]

@CHAOSNUKE_ [$#!$] TV!!!