.

[. @SR15B_LTY]

A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths.

[. @SR15B_LTY]

I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific.

[. @SR15B_LTY]

Housework can't kill you, but why take a chance?

[. @SR15B_LTY]

Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.

[. @SR15B_LTY]

If the facts don't fit the theory, change the facts.

[. @SR15B_LTY]

My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.

[. @SR15B_LTY]

Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.

[. @SR15B_LTY]

As a child my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it.

[. @SR15B_LTY]

A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.

[. @SR15B_LTY]

Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy.

[. @SR15B_LTY]

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

[. @SR15B_LTY]

Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.

[. @SR15B_LTY]

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.

[. @SR15B_LTY]

A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice.

[. @SR15B_LTY]

Life is hard. After all, it kills you.

[. @SR15B_LTY]

There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments.

[. @SR15B_LTY]

A waffle is like a pancake with a syrup trap.

[. @SR15B_LTY]

If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.

[. @SR15B_LTY]

Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot.

[. @SR15B_LTY]

If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.