Jacob Martin

The earth is the Lord's and the fullness thereof, the world and those who dwell therein

[Jacob Martin @Safari_Jake]

“How many Siri’s does it take to say archipelago?” #quoteswithoutcontext

[Jacob Martin @Safari_Jake]

“I saw him once at a corn dog festival. He’s still working hard for the money” #quoteswithoutcontext

[Jacob Martin @Safari_Jake]

“Do you want to get out there and do cartwheels with Fiona?”
Great Aunt (83) - “Do you want to spend some time at the hospital?”

[Jacob Martin @Safari_Jake]

“Do you want to go to the lions den adult super store?”

Great Aunt (83) - “There isn’t anything in there I want. Maybe when I was younger I’d get some reading material and a movie”

[Jacob Martin @Safari_Jake]

Grandma’s house is riveting

[Jacob Martin @Safari_Jake]

We need less commercials during this show. My grandma is falling asleep in her chair #dateline

[Jacob Martin @Safari_Jake]

That guy needs to give up on his hair. Let that go. #dateline

[Jacob Martin @Safari_Jake]

I think we all know that Bob saying he was working out is baloney. He hasn’t seen the ground from the top of a push up since 3rd grade recess #dateline

[Jacob Martin @Safari_Jake]

What the heck is with this lady in pink’s outfit?! Am I the only one losing my mind right now? Is it falling off? #dateline

[Jacob Martin @Safari_Jake]

My wife told me to take the cookies out of the oven at 4 and got mad when I burnt them. Every time I went to check on them the clock it said 350!

[Jacob Martin @Safari_Jake]

For All Mankind is the most awesome concept for a show, but the insane drama and horrible lack of realistic physics ruins it

[Jacob Martin @Safari_Jake]

Post rain

[Jacob Martin @Safari_Jake]

Why oh Lord is it even possible to bite one’s own tongue

[Jacob Martin @Safari_Jake]

Why are all children’s toys monstrosities? What creature has eyes that low or a mouth that looks like a pig’s nose?

[Jacob Martin @Safari_Jake]

Mmm

[Jacob Martin @Safari_Jake]

It’s a bit odd to me that everyone berates me for dosing off during Sunday service when my 1 year old does it all the time. No one says anything to her

[Jacob Martin @Safari_Jake]

Skin colored clothing seems like it should have gone out of fashion

[Jacob Martin @Safari_Jake]

Are you kidding me @HarrisTeeter? $4 for a balloon with helium in it. You’re right off the highway and this is robbery. I wish they had a word for that….

[Jacob Martin @Safari_Jake]

Stranger things 4…. So bad