surf ghost

if I'm at a party, i'm either poopin' or I'm in the kitchen. usually both.

[surf ghost @Salsa_Dave]

@TheSloppyBoys @TimKalpakis Top 5 all time guy

[surf ghost @Salsa_Dave]

Just realized IRS actually stands for I reallllllly stink and taxes make way more sense

[surf ghost @Salsa_Dave]

@johnnypemberton After delivering a pizza I say “enjoy” instead of “have a good one” or whatever and if they reply it’s always “you too” I hope they think about that while eating their pizza and they enjoy it just a little less

[surf ghost @Salsa_Dave]

Kinda fitting that Bradley Cooper has the same initials as butt crack

[surf ghost @Salsa_Dave]

Me trying to make really bad pancakes in a hurry: I don’t have thyme for this!

[Brett Morris @brettsperminute]

That'd be super funny to get me to 1 million followers before this place ends. So stupid right (but fun)

[surf ghost @Salsa_Dave]

Why did the boxing promoter pay Mohammad Ali in mud? Because he was told Cash is Clay

[surf ghost @Salsa_Dave]

My girlfriend said she couldn’t kiss me until I bought her tulips :(

[surf ghost @Salsa_Dave]

Ran into a really old looking Australian child today. Dude must’ve had Benjamin Buttons’ syndrome or something cuz he looked 50+. How do I know he was a child, you ask?? Because I said to him, “how’s it goin?” and he replied, “Good, I’m eight.”

[surf ghost @Salsa_Dave]

I invested all my money in stocks and now all I eat is soup

[surf ghost @Salsa_Dave]

What company is boss baby boss of? Like what do they make? (Other than lil oopsies in their Huggies)

[Doug Benson @DougBenson]

TOM FELT THE MOVIE HAD ENOUGH PILOTS IN IT 21 MORE IS OVERKILL

[surf ghost @Salsa_Dave]

All these dingbats protesting outside planned parenthood on a friday night claim to be pro-life, yet none or them seem to have their own!

[surf ghost @Salsa_Dave]

Had a weird dream, but why don’t choking victims just breathe through their nose?

[josh (oldfriend99) @oldfriend99]

Thinking about the guy on here who used to tag his librarian friend whenever i would do a post making some ridiculous joke about librarians, thinking she would get a kick out of it, never realizing she blocked me the first time he did that

[surf ghost @Salsa_Dave]

Film nuts really love a good climax

[Rivers Cuomo @RiversCuomo]

@puptheband good stuff, guys.

[surf ghost @Salsa_Dave]

From what I understand a wordle is when your alphabet soup noodles look like a word

[SDSU Football @GoJacksFB]

HE DID IT AGAIN!

Dalys Beanum grabs his THIRD interception of the night and takes it home...59 yards down the field!

4Q, 8:46 | SDSU 56, UC Davis 17

#GoJacks🐰🏈 | #NCAAFB