Samuel Williams

Son. Father. Husband. Christian. West Ham fan. Sit-Down Comedian.

[Samuel Williams @SamuelPWilliams]

Got free data with Windscribe VPN.

[Samuel Williams @SamuelPWilliams]

The automatic doors @vuecinemas thanet have.been temporarily not working for over a year. Just how temporary is it. As a disabled person it makes it very difficult.

[Samuel Williams @SamuelPWilliams]

Looked up this year's UK eurovision entry on YouTube. Wish I hadn't. Song is rubbish and she can't sing.

[Samuel Williams @SamuelPWilliams]

@JimJeroo @redbubble Same, but different- saw a @LASTEXITshirts skynet t-shirt on qwertee com.

[Samuel Williams @SamuelPWilliams]

Avoided the whole thing for exactly this reason. It's utterly grotesque.

[Samuel Williams @SamuelPWilliams]

Most hated word- "pupdates".

[Samuel Williams @SamuelPWilliams]

@stevekreeger @_DeclanRice Ten more years
Ten more years
Ten more years....

[Samuel Williams @SamuelPWilliams]

@Sineadholly91 @VueHelp Also, not really a solution for me after a stroke in my 30s left me disabled and gave me a speech disorder. I can be hard to understand if you CAN see my lips.

[Samuel Williams @SamuelPWilliams]

@vuecinemas any reason why it hangs after adding a cea card.

[Samuel Williams @SamuelPWilliams]

Yes, the *ing was intentional.

[Samuel Williams @SamuelPWilliams]

#KingCharlesIII , the arseh***e formally known as prince.

[Samuel Williams @SamuelPWilliams]

@Sineadholly91 @VueHelp I'm no expert, but how hard can it be. They must have lost a lot of money with people trying several times and giving up.

[Samuel Williams @SamuelPWilliams]

We're being in the midst of a huge cost-of-liviing crisis and having parties in the name of someone who can probably wipe his bum with toilet paper made of gold and heat his multiple, large homes using bundles of banknotes as firewood.

#kingcharlesIII #coronation

[Samuel Williams @SamuelPWilliams]

@_DeclanRice @premierleague @WestHam Well done on 200 appearances, but it would be nice, if we didn't wait until we were behind to start playing.

[Samuel Williams @SamuelPWilliams]

Hate it when people whinge about those on benefits having flat screen TVs. As if when someone needs a telly, they go into argos and say "I don't see any in the catalogue, but do have any of the old style TVs that you need a tow truck to get home ".

[Samuel Williams @SamuelPWilliams]

Nothing says "sophisticated" like a glass of fake spiced rum mixed with cherry pepsi max from the soda stream.

[Samuel Williams @SamuelPWilliams]

Puerile, but...

[Matthew Highton @MattHighton]

Here's all the times Alan Grant farts during Jurassic Park. Everyone, welcome to Jurassic Parp:

[Samuel Williams @SamuelPWilliams]

Anyone know when tickets for west ham vs aek larnaca go on general sale?

[Samuel Williams @SamuelPWilliams]

@simonharris_mbd He had a pacemaker fitted on radio 5 live? I would've expected to hear more about that.

[Samuel Williams @SamuelPWilliams]

HEAVEEN (maybe).

https://t.co/fvTi39vEbQ