Samwich Toaster

Biscuits.

[Samwich Toaster @SamwichT]

@Sciencenature14 Pfft... not even a planet bruh 😎

[Samwich Toaster @SamwichT]

@elonmusk Yes.

[Samwich Toaster @SamwichT]

@BadMedicalTakes More like PENIS gland. Pornpornpornpornsoulpornpornporn.

[Gary Lineker @GaryLineker]

Seeing the interview in its entirety is sickening, but at the same time the bullying & patronising nature of it is getting plenty of coverage for what is the most crucial time for our future existence on this planet. Only one person came out of this well & that’s Miranda Whelehan

[Samwich Toaster @SamwichT]

@RobertDowneyJr I GOT MY 5 LIKES

[Samwich Toaster @SamwichT]

@RobertDowneyJr Me: thinks up witty tweet and can't believe how much fun I am. 5 likes.

RDJ: Ketchup. 30k.

Life: you're shit bro.

[Samwich Toaster @SamwichT]

@WKRPinCanada @RexChapman We shall forever quietly roll our eyes when people say "I hate flying" my friend 👊

[Samwich Toaster @SamwichT]

@WKRPinCanada @RexChapman @VancityReynolds I had the same when I wanted to be a pilot!!!! Stupid eyes. I feel you brother 👊

[Samwich Toaster @SamwichT]

@RexChapman I dont have a job. I'm just trying to survive the dragon hordes that have all but decimated the human race. I need Matthew McConaughey. We're starving.

[Samwich Toaster @SamwichT]

@ThatEricAlper Walk.

[Samwich Toaster @SamwichT]

@RobertDowneyJr Reads comments and sees RDJ is, and will forever be, cooler than me.
🤣🤣🤣☠

[Samwich Toaster @SamwichT]

@latestinspace The Sunday driver of planets.

ITS A PLANET!!! @neiltyson

[Samwich Toaster @SamwichT]

@nowthisnews Dumb. And a lie.

[Samwich Toaster @SamwichT]

@thegoodgodabove King Gong

[Samwich Toaster @SamwichT]

@NotFunnyAtAlI But why he giving the finger tho. 🖕🤨 fuck you too Shrektables.

[Gary Lineker @GaryLineker]

The best passer of a football in the English game is a right back. What’s happened to our sport? 🤣 @TrentAA

[Samwich Toaster @SamwichT]

@crazykarens But how much did he pay tho?

[Samwich Toaster @SamwichT]

@sara_carrion_ 🤘😭🤘

[Samwich Toaster @SamwichT]

@Chris_Meloni You get an urge to start clapping when you see her answer a question ayyy