Matt Brehony

Writer, actor, musician, father of triplets. Financial Instability is my middle name.

[Matt Brehony @SandwichForm]

Breaking: The turkey Trump pardoned is a white nationalist with a history of domestic abuse.

[Matt Brehony @SandwichForm]

@hulu_support Thanks for the response. Unfortunately, I tried all that and it's still not working.

[Matt Brehony @SandwichForm]

@hulu Log in page is not working. Just changed my password so I know it's correct plus it's not saying "invalid password," just nothing happens when I click Log In. And every support option requires me to log in first. Please help.

[Matt Brehony @SandwichForm]

@jonlovett Trump just released a transcript of the call...
Her: Hello, this is the woman.
Me: I'm so sorry.
Her: Thanks. You're doing a great job!

[Matt Brehony @SandwichForm]

GOP health care bills be like...
https://t.co/Q29d8VJPyE

[Matt Brehony @SandwichForm]

Let that be a lesson to you kids: if you work hard you can make your wildest dreams come true...and #TomBrady will take them from you.

[Matt Brehony @SandwichForm]

Don't let the door grab you in the p---y on the way out! "Trump campaign leaving VA" https://t.co/54mdIgphBa

[Matt Brehony @SandwichForm]

"While we disagee on much, we can at least agree that the world is run by a man in the sky who sometimes turns into a cracker." #VPDebate

[Matt Brehony @SandwichForm]

If the Trump campaign were smart they would send Pence (in orange-face) to debate Clinton on 10/9. #VPDebate

[Matt Brehony @SandwichForm]

Pre-gaming for the #VPDebate with some warm milk and saltines

[Matt Brehony @SandwichForm]

They're "tortured by ambition," said a man who called the press at 3AM to announce his plans to make an announcement https://t.co/ntI492gIlz

[Matt Brehony @SandwichForm]

Why Everything Tastes Better on Vacation (and what that means for your brand) https://t.co/qSaU8tcY1f @PadillaCRT

[Matt Brehony @SandwichForm]

@hugel Every now and again I like to rattle off a dozen tweets at no one then retire for another six months.

[Matt Brehony @SandwichForm]

The forecast says clear but it's drizzling! Local meteorologist Brett Fitzhume is the #FounderOfISIS #TrumpItUp

[Matt Brehony @SandwichForm]

I said "no whip!" This barista is the #FounderofIsis #TrumpItUp

[Matt Brehony @SandwichForm]

So cloying! This Pina Colada-scented Yankee Candle is the #FounderOfIsis #TrumpItUp

[Matt Brehony @SandwichForm]

Popcorn kernel stuck in my teeth. Orville Redenbacher is the #FounderOfIsis #TrumpItUp

[Matt Brehony @SandwichForm]

Five minutes to make a Manhattan? This bartender is the #FounderOfIsis #TrumpItUp

[Matt Brehony @SandwichForm]

Apple TV keeps freezing. Steve Jobs is the #FounderOfIsis #TrumpItUp

[Matt Brehony @SandwichForm]

@kbredimus I told you, the only Beckys I know have TERRIBLE hair!