Sarah VDK @SarahVDK1 - Twitter Profile

almost 3 years ago

My first encounter with Marshall was during our “Meet the Teacher” event a week before the start of the school year. I remember him being almost as tall as me and he walked up with two younger boys by the hand. Marshall introduced himself and his brothers. I asked if they came with anyone else. I was wondering a bit about where his parents were. Marshall told me that they lived in the city and he and his brothers took an hour taxi drive to school. His mom had to stay home with their other younger brothers. Marshall said that it was his job to make sure that his brothers knew who their teachers were and that they were properly introduced. A large group of students and parents approached, and Marshall and his brothers walked down the hallway towards their classes. I thought that this was a bit strange, but I got busy speaking with other families, and sort of forgot about the encounter. The next day, I called the counselor to my office to learn more about Marshall & his family. She told me that Marshall was a 5th grade student who was the “man of the house”. His father had died when he was a toddler. She also said that to her knowledge there currently was no man living in the home. It was her understanding that Marshall was responsible for getting his brothers ready in the morning. He was the de-facto father. Mom worked a few part-time jobs and usually was sleeping in the morning when the boys left for school. As the school year started, I learned that Marshall was a popular student and had exceptional manners. This was something that stood out since he called me “sir” at least a dozen times in our brief introductory conversation. Academically, he was a bit below-average but what he lacked in book smarts, he made up in street smarts and emotional intelligence. The school staff members really liked him and he smiled a lot and seemed to remember everything. They all envisioned a bright future for him in a relationship business. On a Tuesday afternoon, Marshall was brought to the office by the recess monitor. I immediately thought that this must have been to brag about Marshall’s behavior or for a character sticker for model behavior. Marshall’s face told another story. He did not make eye contact and sat with his head in his hands. The recess monitor said that he apparently started screaming at another student and pushed him to the ground. This appeared to be completely unprovoked. It was also very out of character for Marshall. To say that I was a bit surprised would have been a huge understatement. Marshall did not respond immediately to my questions. This was unusual behavior for Marshall as well. After a while, he finally sat up, looked at me, and said that he was ready to answer any questions. He admitted that the behaviors were all his fault and that the other student did not do anything to provoke him. The other boy was just at the wrong place at the wrong time. Marshall said that he had to man-up and that he was ready to accept any consequence that he received. I told him that I could not understand at all what had happened and why. After a series of other questions, Marshall stated that his family was thrown out of their apartment for not paying rent. They spent the last few nights sleeping in his mom’s car. Last night someone tried to break-in to the car. It scared his family a lot and nobody fell back asleep. Marshall said that his mom was crying all the time and she told him that she had no idea what they were going to do. He said that he thought this was partly his fault because as the man of the house he should have been able to do something about this. He started to cry and put his head back down. We have no idea what our students go through when they are away from school. Remember all behavior is communication. From the book: “Whatever It Takes!: For All Students to Succeed in School and Life” (https://t.co/gDlQoij54k) Join us at the “Maslow Before Bloom” Facebook group; https://t.co/015cLKjJ1m

DrP_Principal's tweet photo. My first encounter with Marshall was during our “Meet the Teacher” event a week before the start of the school year. I remember him being almost as tall as me and he walked up with two younger boys by the hand.

Marshall introduced himself and his brothers. I asked if they came with anyone else. I was wondering a bit about where his parents were.

Marshall told me that they lived in the city and he and his brothers took an hour taxi drive to school. His mom had to stay home with their other younger brothers. Marshall said that it was his job to make sure that his brothers knew who their teachers were and that they were properly introduced. A large group of students and parents approached, and Marshall and his brothers walked down the hallway towards their classes. I thought that this was a bit strange, but I got busy speaking with other families, and sort of forgot about the encounter.

The next day, I called the counselor to my office to learn more about Marshall & his family. She told me that Marshall was a 5th grade student who was the “man of the house”. His father had died when he was a toddler. She also said that to her knowledge there currently was no man living in the home. It was her understanding that Marshall was responsible for getting his brothers ready in the morning. He was the de-facto father. Mom worked a few part-time jobs and usually was sleeping in the morning when the boys left for school.

As the school year started, I learned that Marshall was a popular student and had exceptional manners. This was something that stood out since he called me “sir” at least a dozen times in our brief introductory conversation. Academically, he was a bit below-average but what he lacked in book smarts, he made up in street smarts and emotional intelligence. The school staff members really liked him and he smiled a lot and seemed to remember everything. They all envisioned a bright future for him in a relationship business.

On a Tuesday afternoon, Marshall was brought to the office by the recess monitor. I immediately thought that this must have been to brag about Marshall’s behavior or for a character sticker for model behavior. Marshall’s face told another story. He did not make eye contact and sat with his head in his hands. The recess monitor said that he apparently started screaming at another student and pushed him to the ground. This appeared to be completely unprovoked. It was also very out of character for Marshall. To say that I was a bit surprised would have been a huge understatement.

Marshall did not respond immediately to my questions. This was unusual behavior for Marshall as well. After a while, he finally sat up, looked at me, and said that he was ready to answer any questions. He admitted that the behaviors were all his fault and that the other student did not do anything to provoke him. The other boy was just at the wrong place at the wrong time. Marshall said that he had to man-up and that he was ready to accept any consequence that he received.

I told him that I could not understand at all what had happened and why. After a series of other questions, Marshall stated that his family was thrown out of their apartment for not paying rent. They spent the last few nights sleeping in his mom’s car. Last night someone tried to break-in to the car. It scared his family a lot and nobody fell back asleep.

Marshall said that his mom was crying all the time and she told him that she had no idea what they were going to do. He said that he thought this was partly his fault because as the man of the house he should have been able to do something about this. He started to cry and put his head back down.

We have no idea what our students go through when they are away from school. Remember all behavior is communication.

From the book:
“Whatever It Takes!: For All Students to Succeed in School and Life”
(https://t.co/gDlQoij54k)

Join us at the “Maslow Before Bloom” Facebook group; https://t.co/015cLKjJ1m

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Sarah VDK

@SarahVDK1

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