I’ll tell you right now If I was Sisyphus I would’ve simply stopped rolling the boulder up the hill like a retard and just start spanking my shi crazy style for eternity
Today is the 15th of July 2024 which marks exactly three years since I created the elmaxo channel. This would usually be something I’d celebrate but after a lot of thought and reflection, I have decided that today will also unfortunately mark the end of my time creating TF2 videos.
I know this is a very sudden announcement but no, I’m not joking or trying to farm some online engagement. I have spent a lot of time thinking about this for well over six months now and have realised that creating TF2 content doesn’t fulfil me in the way it once did. I absolutely love making videos, that much definitely hasn’t changed, the only issue is that my passion for gaming in general has dwindled the older I have gotten.
Unless I am playing TF2 with the distinct purpose of creating a video or socialising with my friends in a voice call whilst playing League of Legends in the background, I just find it genuinely challenging to sit down and play a video game by myself these days. It doesn’t feel like I have that intrinsic love for gaming I once did and the prospect of making videos about something my heart isn’t fully invested in doesn’t sit right with me and it doesn’t feel fair to you guys either.
I know a lot of you may say that what I am experiencing is burnout, especially after doing so many intensive challenge videos, and all I need to do is take a short break but I assure you that this dwindling interest in gaming runs a lot deeper than that. This is something I have noticed within myself since I finished high school almost five years ago and I really started to reflect on it during a trip to Japan late last year.
This wasn’t an easy decision to make whatsoever, especially with all of the time I have invested into this channel but I think deep down it’s what I have to do. I really do love making videos and I have interests outside of gaming I want to explore that I think will bring about a greater sense of purpose and fulfilment in my life which I hope you guys can understand.
I do not plan to touch the elmaxo channel whatsoever and any future projects I work on will be under an entirely separate account. I still haven’t fleshed out a proper plan and I apologise if this comes across as vague as I am still wrapping my head around what the future looks like for myself. All I know for certain is that I want to be out and about in the real world using a camera and physically meeting new people more.
In the past I have found the process of creating TF2 content to be very isolating at times as I can literally play the game, write a script, record my voice lines and edit the final product all without getting out of my chair and leaving my room and I definitely want this to change. Dropping out of university to pursue YouTube did restrict my ability to actually connect with other people and I definitely want to invest more time into this part of my life moving forward.
There is a chance that this is my Michael Jordan moment where I quit the NBA for 18 months to pursue baseball only to realise that making TF2 videos has always been my true passion but I’ll never know that to be true without making that leap of faith first. I also don’t want to set any false expectations which lead people to hold onto a day in the distant future where I may potentially return to making TF2 videos, so I am treating this decision as final.
I have loved every single second of this journey and words cannot express how grateful I am for even having this opportunity in the first place. I hold the community which surrounds this game in very high regard and I will always be indebted to you guys for actualising my childhood dreams of becoming a YouTuber.
I’ve met so many people and as funny as it may sound, this channel has taught me so much about myself in the past three years and I wouldn’t change it for anything.
Thank you so much for everything.
elmaxo
hi this is gungybungy tweeting. its pride month and i've decided to finally come out. i'm gay. please continue to support me and the giggleballs pretty please with a cherry on top.