Lawrence (Larry) seltzer

If I did it for the laughs, I'd be dead by now.

[Lawrence (Larry) seltzer @SeltzerLawrence]

There is no god

[Lawrence (Larry) seltzer @SeltzerLawrence]

@SMHighlights1 Take off that hat @RichPaul4

[Lawrence (Larry) seltzer @SeltzerLawrence]

@MovieMantz @KTLA @KTLAMorningNews @ktlaENT More like Scott "Tubi" Mantz

[Lawrence (Larry) seltzer @SeltzerLawrence]

@BobGolen Still got it!

[Lawrence (Larry) seltzer @SeltzerLawrence]

@C_HANN_ING @grizzgoatsports *Sanders to Corley

[Lawrence (Larry) seltzer @SeltzerLawrence]

@PatMcAfeeShow It's like the Browns went spelunkin and came back with Monken.

[Lawrence (Larry) seltzer @SeltzerLawrence]

@KenCarman @SportsBoyTony Jim Schwartz? Nah that ship has sunken. We hired Todd Monken.

[Lawrence (Larry) seltzer @SeltzerLawrence]

@Browns I mean, what in the funkin? You hired Todd Monken?!

[Lawrence (Larry) seltzer @SeltzerLawrence]

@NathanZegura I have a feeling we'll look back a couple years from now and say "Say, who brought all this junk in? Oh that's right: Todd Monken!"

[Lawrence (Larry) seltzer @SeltzerLawrence]

@ohiotate Really? Cause I'd say they're flunkin. I mean, they hired Todd Monken??

[Lawrence (Larry) seltzer @SeltzerLawrence]

@PolymarketBlitz I mean, you'd really have to've been drunken to hire Todd Monken.

[Lawrence (Larry) seltzer @SeltzerLawrence]

@JeffDLowe The whole time I've been like "Know what'd really have stunken? To end up with Monken."

[Lawrence (Larry) seltzer @SeltzerLawrence]

@JordanZirm I mean, who'd of thunken we'd end up with Monken?

[Eric Alper 🎧 @ThatEricAlper]

More than 20 years later, this photo STILL chokes me up.

[Lawrence (Larry) seltzer @SeltzerLawrence]

@Sam_in_Babylon Actually your wife took it while your mom was on all fours

[Lawrence (Larry) seltzer @SeltzerLawrence]

There is no god

[Lawrence (Larry) seltzer @SeltzerLawrence]

@Sam_in_Babylon

[Lawrence (Larry) seltzer @SeltzerLawrence]

@Browns

[Lawrence (Larry) seltzer @SeltzerLawrence]

@Browns As our lives grow shorter, more hopeless than the last coach's tenure, marching slowly, forcibly onward, into the encroaching permanent dark.

-An elegy for Swagger the Dawg

[Lawrence (Larry) seltzer @SeltzerLawrence]

@Sam_in_Babylon

[Lawrence (Larry) seltzer @SeltzerLawrence]

@Sam_in_Babylon How's this for words, Samwise? "Dear, God. Don't give this guy weed."

[Lawrence (Larry) seltzer @SeltzerLawrence]

@Sam_in_Babylon I think you mean to say that the end of wisdom was the beginning of your life.