I said all of that to tell you this—
In 1999, I shared a dorm with a man named Beong(pronounced BONG)deong(DONG). Beongdeong made it a habit to corner you when you'd least expect it and would firmly grasp your penis while uttering, "You have been bonged, make peace with your dong. Tai hao le," before slowly pulling your penis from its penis socket, all with a sinister Oriental smile.
Beongdeong was tried and sentenced to 37 years in prison having been found guilty of over 200 penis removals but he never managed to pull my penis off because I always had it buttered up. Even so, I still sometimes hear him stalking the halls, whistling and singing his signature tune: "Me Beongdeong, sing penis song, tai hao le bing bong me steal you dong" and honestly, good for him
Touhou Music Spotlight #66:
Locked Girl ~ The Girl's Secret Room
To celebrate the rerelease of the Embodiment of Scarlet Devil soon, here's Patchouli's theme