Never too late to love yourself and taking good care of you first, do what feeds your soul and lifts your spirit. You are your own project and should work on yourself, might take time but eventually you will alright.
It's not that you havent been yourself , the issue is that you know your worth and potential but those haven't manifested yet due to the following
Its not your turn yet. Self-sabotage
Lacking patience & discipline
Change is like death we don't what awaits us,both are guaranteed