Shana M.

Criminology Major/Super Mom/Career Cynic

[Shana M. @Shaerae4real]

Saying “no we can’t” when Bob the Builder asked “can we fix it?” because you were a rebellious cunt of a child.

[Shana M. @Shaerae4real]

The mighty dildo of consequences rarely arrives lubed. #KARMATOBER

[Shana M. @Shaerae4real]

@Twitter EXPLAIN THIS! This talented artist had his account suspended after this stunning artwork portraying @elonmusk got too much attention?! You ARE the problem in this world Twitter. Fix yourself. #Trending #artistsontwitter

[Ehab Salem @EhaabSalem]

Can twitter help my talented friend @fabriceartist get his account back up ? He drew @elonmusk and his account got suspended

[Shana M. @Shaerae4real]

Got bored. So I went car shopping, like the f**king Queen of Unemployment. Anyways, I’m here to tell you there are NO NEW CARS. They ain’t even got no old cars. They out here taking orders for the 2028 #VW Yabadabadoo GT. I am shooketh. #FOMO #DasAuto #NoAuto

[Shana M. @Shaerae4real]

If I stop my car so you can walk across the street, I better see some hustle out of you. I’m talkin’ bout knees to chest b*tch. Knees 👏🏽 to 👏🏽 chest 👏🏽 #realtalk

[Shana M. @Shaerae4real]

You know gas prices are high when the dood in the lifted truck isn’t revving his engine in the Walmart parking lot during mating season. #FunFact #gasprices

[Patrick Jolicoeur @pattyjolicoeur]

*Holding gun to victim’s head*

“You have a choice: eat this poop sandwich or I’ll shoot.”

“What kind of a choice is that?!”

“SOME CHOICES HAVE CONSEQUENCES BUT YOU STILL HAVE A FREE CHOICE NOW EAT THE SANDWICH OR ELSE!”

#FreedomConvoy2022

[Shana M. @Shaerae4real]

The online fundraising platform, GiveSendGo, announced it would accept donations for the convoy shortly after #GoFundMe backed out. @GiveSendGo #FreedomConvoyCanada2022

[Shana M. @Shaerae4real]

I’m gonna f**k your dad and give him a child he’ll actually love. #backonmybullshit #skids #fyp

[Shana M. @Shaerae4real]

SHE REOPENED THE GYMS. All other restrictions remain in place. #FreeBC

[Shana M. @Shaerae4real]

Whoever called it Blue Balls instead of a Cummy Ache really missed a great opportunity there. #letsfaceit #imfunny

[Shana M. @Shaerae4real]

Forgive me Father for I am back on my bullshit.

[Shana M. @Shaerae4real]

[a toddler’s eternal optimism] Me: Scooping cat shit from the mystical box of pee flavoured sprinkles… 3 yr old: Wow mom. That’s just, soooo beautiful! #sippycuphalffull

[Shana M. @Shaerae4real]

Stop being an asshole.

There.

Now I’m your life coach.

#BackOnMyBullshit

[Shana M. @Shaerae4real]

#Covid ‘scientists’ probably out here having seizures rn. Y’all gotta relax: Google is still working, and you can still finish your PhD in Utter Nonsense from U of YouTube as well. #facebookdown iS THat yOu bIG pHaRMa ?!

[Shana M. @Shaerae4real]

😮‍💨 Thought I was put in jail. Turns out is just a global #facebookdown event.

[Perbez 🇮🇳 @ShanawaPerbez]

People coming on Twitter to check what happened to whatsapp, Facebook and Instagram 🤣
#facebookdown

[Shana M. @Shaerae4real]

Greenday 2004: Wake me up when September ends. Greenday 2021: We fucked up. Just let us sleep.

[Shana M. @Shaerae4real]

Do you pull your mask down when someone’s talking to you so you can hear them better? Or are you normal?

[Shana M. @Shaerae4real]

When it’s sweatpants season and someone asks me what’s on my mind…