Shashank J

ask my friends they'll tell lots about me

[Naveen Reddy @navin_ankampali]

A historic milestone for Chitradurga! 💧

The Upper Bhadra Project’s trial-run waters have now reached Gonuru Lake, the terminal lake in Chitradurga district.

Water released from the Bhadra Reservoir through the Chitradurga Branch Canal has travelled across the district, bringing fresh hope to farmers and drought-hit communities.

This marks a major step towards strengthening irrigation and water security in Chitradurga. 🌾💧

#UpperBhadraProject #Chitradurga #Bhadra #Karnataka #WaterForFarmers

[Fundamental Investor ™ 🇮🇳 @FI_InvestIndia]

For 24 years, Mirka Federer stayed in the Background.

But her Speech inducting Roger Federer into the International Tennis Hall of Fame just broke the internet. 😭🐐

Heart Touching.

The Most Beautiful Video on my Timeline Today !!!

This is What a Family Looks Like. Respect. Awe. Support.

And Most Importantly, Cherishing those Wonderful Moments.

Share Widely. But After Watching ❤️

#FI

[Krish Ashok @krishashok]

Many years ago, my grandmother (who taught me how to be curious about the world and how to tell stories) did a Skype call with my brother in the US and it blew her mind that this was happening in real time. She still thought it was some kind of “TV recording” that he sent by post.

Her sense of wonder at the incredible rate of technological progress with zero tendency to glorify the past (I mean, a woman forced out of school at 13 to marry is rarely going to look at the past with fond memories) instilled in me the optimism that the science, despite short term disappointments, corporate greed and corruption, will, on the long run, make our lives better.

A few weeks ago, this beautiful essay https://t.co/dTfncsp6sC and I wanted to make a video inspired by that and my grabdmkther. Your own recent ancestors will find your ordinary day to day life to be PURE MAGIC

[Robert Sterling @RobertMSterling]

> you’ll never start a rocket company
> you’ll never build your own engines
> you’ll never be able to use off-the-shelf parts
> you’ll never survive three launch failures
> you’ll never reach orbit
> you’ll never win NASA’s trust
> you’ll never launch cargo to the ISS
> you’ll never compete with Boeing
> you’ll never compete with Lockheed
> you’ll never make rockets reusable
> you’ll never land a rocket vertically
> you’ll never land one on a drone ship
> you’ll never reuse a booster
> you’ll never fly the same booster 10 times
> you’ll never fly the same booster 20 times
> you’ll never fly the same booster 30 times
> you’ll never recover and reuse the fairing
> you’ll never lower launch costs
> you’ll never launch every month
> you’ll never launch every week
> you’ll never launch multiple times a week
> you’ll never carry astronauts
> you’ll never replace Roscosmos
> you’ll never fly civilians to orbit
> you’ll never manufacture satellites at scale
> you’ll never build the biggest constellation ever
> you’ll never make satellite internet work
> you’ll never make satellite internet fast
> you’ll never make satellite internet affordable
> you’ll never serve rural customers
> you’ll never serve aircraft and ships
> you’ll never build a methane rocket engine
> you’ll never make full-flow staged combustion work
> you’ll never build the most powerful rocket ever
> you’ll never build a rocket bigger than Saturn V
> you’ll never build it out of stainless steel
> you’ll never launch Starship
> you’ll never separate Super Heavy and Starship
> you’ll never relight Raptor in space
> you’ll never bring Super Heavy back
> you’ll never catch a booster with Mechazilla tower arms
> you’ll never launch 85% of mass to orbit worldwide
> you’ll never change the economics of space
> you’ll never force the entire industry to copy you
> you’ll never win
> you’ll never IPO

Congratulations to @elonmusk and the SpaceX team. You did what countless people said was impossible, and you did it time and time again.

Today is your day. You deserve this. May it be a glorious one.

[spidey @lochan_twt]

The day a blind man sees. The first thing he throws away is the stick that has helped him all his life

[Community Notes & Violations @CNviolations]

The most entertaining two minutes I've watched today.

[shraddha @shraddhaha]

i mapped every metro ride in bangalore using government RTI data

things i found interesting:

> the 3 busiest stations carry more people than the quietest 2 combined

> only 15% of people actually live close enough to walk to a station (!)

> some stations move 40k people a day. some move 689. 689?? that's like two buses. why is this station even a thing?

> purple line carries 1.5x the load of the green line but has the same ticket price and same train frequency

> the yellow line is running at 37% the load of purple, but with the same frequency and ticket price

click the link below to explore the map (desktop recommended)

[Shashank vaidya @shashank_v7]

“Kindergarten ‘Graduation Day’ in schools across Bengaluru is unnecessary hype. Graduation should mean completing a degree, not moving from one class to another. Are schools focusing on education or just creating events?”
#bengaluru #indianeducation #schoolculture @EduMinOfIndia

[Shiv @mr_Tubun]

Internet peaked When AIB recreated memes with Irrfan Khan 💯

It's a shame that AIB had to shut down

[Mufaddal Vohra @mufaddal_vohra]

IPL PROMO BY STAR SPORTS.

- Finally a good Ad by Star Sports. 😄👏

[Sandrocotti @sabeaux]

No gas => No chhole => No gas

Vicious cycle.

[Rosita Díaz @RositaDaz48]

I got a call from a scammer yesterday.

Me: “Hello.”

Scammer: (thick, heavy accent) “Hello. This is Tom Smith from Microsoft Support. We are seeing a lot of virus activity coming from your device.”

Me: “Oh no. My device? Are you sure?”

Scammer: “Oh yes, Madam. We have many reports.”

Me: “Oh, jeez. How can I fix it?”

Scammer: “It’s okay, Madam. We can help you right now. Are you in front of your device?”

Me: “Yes. I was just about to use it. I’m glad you called.”

Scammer: “Good, Madam. Please push the Start button.”

Me: “I think it’s already on.”

Scammer: “Okay, Madam. Now click on Control Panel.”

Me: “I don’t see that.”

Scammer: “Do you see a bunch of information above the Start button?”

Me: “Yes.”

Scammer: “That is your Control Panel.”

Me: “Wow. I didn’t realize it had a name.”

Scammer: “Yes, Madam. Now press Internet Options.”

Me: “I don’t see any Internet options. I don’t think I bought that feature. This is just a cheap one.”

Scammer: “All devices have Internet, Madam. Press the Start button again.”

Me: “Okay. Same as before.”

Scammer: “That’s fine, Madam. We will restart your device. Please turn it off.”

Me: “Um… I don’t know how. I’ve never turned it off. It kind of just stays on.”

Scammer: “There must be an off button. How do you stop it when it’s running?”

Me: “I usually press the big button.”

Scammer: “Okay, Madam. Press that button.”

Me: “Okay.”

Scammer: “Is your device off?”

Me: “No. The door popped open.”

Scammer: “Door? Is there a disc inside?”

Me: “No. There’s a burrito.”

Scammer: “Why is there a burrito in your computer?”

Me: “Computer? I thought you said this was microwave support.”

[IT Unprofessional @it_unprofession]

Just wrapped my first meeting of the year. It was about "optimizing our software licensing costs."

The CFO wants to cut $50K from our Microsoft budget. She asked if we really need Office 365 E5 licenses for everyone.

I told her we absolutely do. I said E5 has "Advanced Threat Protection" and that downgrading to E3 would expose us to "state-level security vulnerabilities."

She asked what that meant. I said, "Think ransomware, but from other countries."
She went pale and approved the full budget.

Here's the thing: 90% of our staff uses Excel and Outlook. They don't touch a single E5 feature. We could switch to E3 tomorrow and nobody would notice.

But I have E5. My entire leadership team has E5. And I'm not about to lose my unlimited OneDrive storage and Premium Teams features because someone wanted to save money on the accounting department.

The $50K "savings" she wanted? I told her we'd find it by "renegotiating our printer maintenance contract."

We don't have a printer maintenance contract. But she doesn't know that.

Budget meetings are just theater where you make other people feel like they won.

[Peter Girnus 🦅 @gothburz]

Last quarter I rolled out Microsoft Copilot to 4,000 employees.

$30 per seat per month.

$1.4 million annually.

I called it "digital transformation."

The board loved that phrase.

They approved it in eleven minutes.

No one asked what it would actually do.

Including me.

I told everyone it would "10x productivity."

That's not a real number.

But it sounds like one.

HR asked how we'd measure the 10x.

I said we'd "leverage analytics dashboards."

They stopped asking.

Three months later I checked the usage reports.

47 people had opened it.

12 had used it more than once.

One of them was me.

I used it to summarize an email I could have read in 30 seconds.

It took 45 seconds.

Plus the time it took to fix the hallucinations.

But I called it a "pilot success."

Success means the pilot didn't visibly fail.

The CFO asked about ROI.

I showed him a graph.

The graph went up and to the right.

It measured "AI enablement."

I made that metric up.

He nodded approvingly.

We're "AI-enabled" now.

I don't know what that means.

But it's in our investor deck.

A senior developer asked why we didn't use Claude or ChatGPT.

I said we needed "enterprise-grade security."

He asked what that meant.

I said "compliance."

He asked which compliance.

I said "all of them."

He looked skeptical.

I scheduled him for a "career development conversation."

He stopped asking questions.

Microsoft sent a case study team.

They wanted to feature us as a success story.

I told them we "saved 40,000 hours."

I calculated that number by multiplying employees by a number I made up.

They didn't verify it.

They never do.

Now we're on Microsoft's website.

"Global enterprise achieves 40,000 hours of productivity gains with Copilot."

The CEO shared it on LinkedIn.

He got 3,000 likes.

He's never used Copilot.

None of the executives have.

We have an exemption.

"Strategic focus requires minimal digital distraction."

I wrote that policy.

The licenses renew next month.

I'm requesting an expansion.

5,000 more seats.

We haven't used the first 4,000.

But this time we'll "drive adoption."

Adoption means mandatory training.

Training means a 45-minute webinar no one watches.

But completion will be tracked.

Completion is a metric.

Metrics go in dashboards.

Dashboards go in board presentations.

Board presentations get me promoted.

I'll be SVP by Q3.

I still don't know what Copilot does.

But I know what it's for.

It's for showing we're "investing in AI."

Investment means spending.

Spending means commitment.

Commitment means we're serious about the future.

The future is whatever I say it is.

As long as the graph goes up and to the right.

[IT Unprofessional @it_unprofession]

Last month my intern asked for help with a Kubernetes error.

He was stuck on a YAML file.

He looked desperate.

I make $275,000 a year.

I haven't written a line of code since 2017.

I don't even know what a "pod" is.

But I didn't tell him that.

I leaned back in my Herman Miller chair.

I said, "Stop trying to code. Start prompting."

I told him to paste the error into ChatGPT.

He did.

The AI told him to delete the cluster.

He did.

Production went down instantly.

The CEO called me screaming.

I didn't panic.

I told the CEO we were "testing our disaster recovery protocols."

He was impressed by my foresight.

I got a bonus.

The intern got fired.

Innovation requires sacrifice.

Just not mine.

[Arjun* @mxtaverse]

There should be a provision where Govt returns a portion of income tax paid by an employee if he or she gets laid off.

You taxed them when they were earning. Now help them in their tough times.

[Srihari Karanth @sriharikaranth]

Drone View of Yellow Line Metro from RV Road, Jayanagar to Electronic City!

#bengaluru #bangalore #nammametro

[Harsh Goenka @hvgoenka]

A Telangana official Venkateshwarulu saluting his senior. Nothing unusual.
Except… the new District Collector is his daughter.
I’m sure this salute was filled with pride, not protocol.

[ᴅᴏᴜʙʟᴇ-🆁 @Naam_Hi_Kafi_H]

*Family Function exist*

That one room :

[nou @mandhanahive]

"the greatest thing about a test match, it always gives u a second chance"