Danielle Kayahara

Wisecracks for weirdos | Will set the time on your microwave | Deletes tweets with typos #SheSeesMovies #SheDoesShows #DollarStories

[Danielle Kayahara @SheTellsJokes]

It’s a magnet because stickers are vandalism and I’m not that cool.

[Danielle Kayahara @SheTellsJokes]

@X About replies and mentions https://t.co/JDDlFQ4mH0

[Winnipeg Police Cause Harm @WpgPoliceHarm]

WINNIPEG - There is a round dance and march happening TODAY at 2pm at Portage & Main in solidarity with the Harris and Myran families in their effort to #SearchTheLandfills!

Please come out and share if you can!

[Danielle Kayahara @SheTellsJokes]

Yeah, that checks out.

“Thanks to Elon: Proud Boys.”

[Danielle Kayahara @SheTellsJokes]

Hunbots, are you tired of you man refusing to your #MLM because it’s for girls?

Introducing #Crypto, the #MLM for him!

[Danielle Kayahara @SheTellsJokes]

I thought there were alt-right folks screaming about the end times when I saw #FALSEGOD was trending with #HOLYLAND.

[Danielle Kayahara @SheTellsJokes]

Congrats, King Chuck.

[Danielle Kayahara @SheTellsJokes]

Today I learned you can only die on Twitter.

[Danielle Kayahara @SheTellsJokes]

I don’t want to post to Twitter anymore. But where else can I admit that I know so little about sports that, at a glance, I misread the #bucciovertimechallenge as the #BuscemiOverTimeChallenge?

[Danielle Kayahara @SheTellsJokes]

Did I remember to take my anti-anxiety meds today? Only the night terrors will tell.

[sal 🫐 @ghostinmypocket]

Can’t believe Stephanie Hsu, who played a depressed immigrant daughter traveling throughout the universe to find a version of her mother who loved her, lost to an irs agent

[Danielle Kayahara @SheTellsJokes]

@alex_ateah Same.

[Danielle Kayahara @SheTellsJokes]

Is #smalldickenergy carbon neutral?

If so, maybe there’s still a future for Andrew Tate. 🤣

[Danielle Kayahara @SheTellsJokes]

I’ve never witness a more satisfying ratio than @GretaThunberg vs. the embodiment of a edgy teenage boy’s bedroom that is @Cobratate

[Greta Thunberg @GretaThunberg]

yes, please do enlighten me. email me at [email protected]

[Danielle Kayahara @SheTellsJokes]

When I inevitably give up on Twitter, this is the silliness that I’ll miss the most.

[Danielle Kayahara @SheTellsJokes]

Wow, Betty White and Elton John? I’d never have thought that they dated!

[Danielle Kayahara @SheTellsJokes]

Even @Twitter can’t figure out what @elonmusk is doing.

[Danielle Kayahara @SheTellsJokes]

We are Elon, for we are petty. - @EL0N_MUSKRAT

[Danielle Kayahara @SheTellsJokes]

I always assumed it would be the trolls that killed Twitter, I just thought it was take more than one.

[Danielle Kayahara @SheTellsJokes]

I don’t think Radio Shack ever died. I think it just switch from the dad market to moms and renamed themselves Michaels.

Why else would both want such oddly personal information when you’re just trying to buy the pieces to something that would be cheaper to buy whole?