ShitMattSayyz

Quotes from one guy just having a good time

[ShitMattSayyz @ShitMattSayyz]

Life literally all about seesing but can't reaches

[ShitMattSayyz @ShitMattSayyz]

“@horsetheband is still investigating niacin. We watched that 24 hour doc twice. That’s the only thing I remember”- @seanpatrick530

[ShitMattSayyz @ShitMattSayyz]

I keep trying to microdose but keep taking too much

[ShitMattSayyz @ShitMattSayyz]

@brianJdelumpa The Ten

[ShitMattSayyz @ShitMattSayyz]

for a few years there, all i did was fall off things.

[ShitMattSayyz @ShitMattSayyz]

I think I have diabetes

[ShitMattSayyz @ShitMattSayyz]

Oh I said "she's wearing your coat"?

[ShitMattSayyz @ShitMattSayyz]

It feels bad that I don't pay attention to porn star names any more

[ShitMattSayyz @ShitMattSayyz]

Gives me a marriage sandwich

[ShitMattSayyz @ShitMattSayyz]

You look like an infomercial - #ShitBSayyz

[ShitMattSayyz @ShitMattSayyz]

The concept of soaking is one of the dirtiest things I've heard of.

Yeah I've done that

[ShitMattSayyz @ShitMattSayyz]

I can't wait to go to your black wedding.

[ShitMattSayyz @ShitMattSayyz]

I like taking a Coors light in there and just pouring it half on me. It's good for the skin

[ShitMattSayyz @ShitMattSayyz]

My farts smell like I'm turding in someone's nose

[ShitMattSayyz @ShitMattSayyz]

I crop dusted the shit out of the sock store

[ShitMattSayyz @ShitMattSayyz]

There's my secret agent name: Deep Anus

[ShitMattSayyz @ShitMattSayyz]

Someone should do the baby food challenge. I just made it up. Whoever can eat the most baby food in 10 minutes wins.

[ShitMattSayyz @ShitMattSayyz]

When I get my bidet, do you want to come over and use it?

[ShitMattSayyz @ShitMattSayyz]

Doesn't care actually. Probably full of poop and gushers.

[ShitMattSayyz @ShitMattSayyz]

Wanna see my dead toenail? #ShitSeanSayyz