Shit Uber Drivers Shouldn't Say

Uber drivers say the darndest things.

[Shit Uber Drivers Shouldn't Say @ShitShouldn]

Don't worry about that beeping. It's just my ankle bracelet... acting up.

[Shit Uber Drivers Shouldn't Say @ShitShouldn]

"If it smells like weed in here it's because I'm high"

[Shit Uber Drivers Shouldn't Say @ShitShouldn]

"Taxi company fired me so now I'm doing this. Can't fire myself for driving drunk."

[Shit Uber Drivers Shouldn't Say @ShitShouldn]

"Hold the wheel while I grab something from the back seat"

[Shit Uber Drivers Shouldn't Say @ShitShouldn]

"You mind navigating? I'm on 1%."

[Shit Uber Drivers Shouldn't Say @ShitShouldn]

"Mind if I take my shoes off?"

[Shit Uber Drivers Shouldn't Say @ShitShouldn]

"Forgot to put my contacts in today. You buckled up?"

[Shit Uber Drivers Shouldn't Say @ShitShouldn]

"Nah man, stop signs are more like a suggestion"

[Shit Uber Drivers Shouldn't Say @ShitShouldn]

"You guys ever play the cruise control game?"

[Shit Uber Drivers Shouldn't Say @ShitShouldn]

"If we get pulled over, this is your beer."