Shit Stephan Says

[Shit Stephan Says @ShitStephanSays]

The sign says no weapons, so I'll have to take my legs off before I go I go inside

[Shit Stephan Says @ShitStephanSays]

@billyharllee @rchlstnly @velojonny @mikethompsonx4 @SwimJules @davidfuent @lancearmstrong @JackSBR1 @khwilliamson @JamesBonney ok 7 nxt thu

[Shit Stephan Says @ShitStephanSays]

@lancearmstrong @rchlstnly @velojonny @mikethompsonx4 @billyharllee @SwimJules @davidfuent @JackSBR1 @khwilliamson @JamesBonney nxt Thur 8a?

[Shit Stephan Says @ShitStephanSays]

These days I race more like a buzzard. I wait for the others to drop before I make my move.

[Shit Stephan Says @ShitStephanSays]

I have a two week old baby and I still drop Dan.

[Shit Stephan Says @ShitStephanSays]

When I predicted that my son would be born on Dec 3, I meant Dec 3 in Germany.

[Shit Stephan Says @ShitStephanSays]

Kevin, the only way that you'll beat me on a bike is if we're on a tandem and you're in front.

[Shit Stephan Says @ShitStephanSays]

...while reviewing the Ironman Hawaii run course: "if you see @patrickevoe, that's a good place to drop him"

[Shit Stephan Says @ShitStephanSays]

The fun part is over. Time to turn off the pain sensors.

[Shit Stephan Says @ShitStephanSays]

The factory forgot to install pain sensors when they made me

[Shit Stephan Says @ShitStephanSays]

When you look down and see you are in your small chainring, you know your race is over!

[Shit Stephan Says @ShitStephanSays]

It's better to really suffer for 10 seconds, then have a wheel, than it is to suffer alone for a half hour.

[Shit Stephan Says @ShitStephanSays]

What's the difference between a new bike and a new girlfriend? ...you don't want to get a new bike wet.

[Shit Stephan Says @ShitStephanSays]

I'm an American now, but all my parts were manufactured in Germany. (on the day he got his US citizenship)

[Shit Stephan Says @ShitStephanSays]

"Would you keep your girlfriend in the garage?" (in response to a person questioning why he keeps his bikes in his kitchen.)

[Shit Stephan Says @ShitStephanSays]

(Referring to his wedding reception) I don't normally dance, but when I do, I dance all night.

[Shit Stephan Says @ShitStephanSays]

We rode through Johnson City, where we ran into @patrickevoe, and two other girls.