Shozo

Welcome to the shitshow. All panic, no disco. free Palestine forever 🇵🇸

[Shozo @Shozokaru]

I'm an done asking nicely for basic fucking empathy and dignity from these people.

[Shozo @Shozokaru]

Lmfao every sports bet for today just blew up

[The Touchline | 𝐓 @TouchlineX]

🚨 𝗝𝗨𝗦𝗧 𝗜𝗡: Norway will use their team B against France today. Erling Haaland and Ødegaard will all be on the bench.

Up to 10 players who started against Senegal will be on the bench.

— @lequipe

[muskawo @muskawo]

asmon to his mom arriving home from hospital:

[Shozo @Shozokaru]

Remember, you cant use laxatives or any other medicines because thats intentional harm/booby trap etc.

However you can use the hottest extracts imaginable as long as you stfu and just say you like spicy food and you didn't intend for someone else to eat it

[Dike Clinton Chisom @DikenaClinton]

She added ghost pepper to her food to catch the coworker who kept stealing her lunch, and it worked.

[sam parker @samprkr]

The vote blue no matter who crowd seems to get extremely butthurt seconds after things don’t go their way

[Middy @middyishappy]

@ZohranKMamdani tell that bitch hakeem jeffries he’s next

[Shozo @Shozokaru]

If its PA, probably Amish. If youre wandering around NY theyre most likely Mennonite, which is basically Amish light. They drive tractors and have power, but they use horse and buggy and look Amish

[Freddy🇩🇪 @FreddyLA7]

We just saw our first Amish people!!!! They were coming toward us in a horse-drawn buggy. Such a cool moment. I don’t want to record them without their permission, so you’ll have to trust me on this one.

[Brett Kollmann @BrettKollmann]

Haaland keeps jump scaring these goalies like a fuckin babadook lmao

[makai ➡️AC @makaikatte]

“juneteenth is a made up holiday”

bitch all holidays are fucking made up, just say you’re racist lol

[27. @dimvji]

“fuck you’re tight” me to my budget

[Freddy @Flodsvinet2]

This is a lie
All that food is meant for Haaland
If we don't keep him well-fed he might start feeding on local wildlife

[unfadable so pls dont try to fade this @seedtheclouds]

In honor of America’s win please enjoy our National Anthem

[B.W. Carlin @BaileyCarlin]

Good lord this edit. Insane.

[Shozo @Shozokaru]

Bonus points if shes a man hater everywhere else except with you

[Echo 🔆 @TheEcho13]

Turning a woman into a soft little sleepy thing who can actually relax beside you is exactly the flex you think it is.

[Shozo @Shozokaru]

Understanding this mechanism and how the brain struggles to process extreme pleasure and pain at the same time is a key part of understanding BDSM lol

[dop @Dop______]

If someone stabbed you and started sucking you off after, would you feel the stab wound pain or the blowjob pleasure?

[Softboy @softboywin]

Y’all don’t use paper plates? Shiiiiit, I’d use a paper pot if I could....FUCK THEM DISHES 😂

[Amunet @freakoutsideofx]

Happy Juneteenth!!

[Grillmaster Nehmdawghausen 🍉 @nehmdoge]

Everyone who’s not a soccer fan finding out about Haaland is killing me lmfao. Yeah that caveman looking cyborg is simultaneously one of the funniest people alive and one of the greatest strikers alive

[… @Dreadful4Tymes]

“In oThEr CouNTRIes tHeY’LL cuT yA aRm oFF FoR sTeALINg”

And in the ours they’ll shoot a one year old in the chest over “stolen” diapers even when you have a receipt.

[av glock🧩( -_•)╦̵̵̿╤─ @futonchill]

you should always smell nice cuz the first hole you penetrate is someone’s nostrils

[Libby, strongest preygirl @libbysalt]

Cockblocking implies the existence of cockparrying with precise timing