SideEffectsMayVary

Professional overthinker, Amateur everything else.

[SideEffectsMayVary @SideEffectsM]

I don't know who needs to hear this, but the last biscuit at the church meeting is always a test.

[SideEffectsMayVary @SideEffectsM]

Woke up this morning barely able to walk with back pain. Body’s 95, pension’s 67, bank account’s 12. 💀👴

[SideEffectsMayVary @SideEffectsM]

The clocks have gone back, and now I’m waking up at 4am instead of 5am.

Even time itself is trying to make my life worse. 💀

[SideEffectsMayVary @SideEffectsM]

Being an adult is just saying “I need to get my life together” every day until you die.

And somehow, the laundry is still winning.

[SideEffectsMayVary @SideEffectsM]

@WydRomanX Iran

[SideEffectsMayVary @SideEffectsM]

@Emma_224vi Misty

[SideEffectsMayVary @SideEffectsM]

My mum fell, hit her head, cracked her ribs and injured her knees.

Took her to hospital just in case. 18-hour wait.

Apparently the NHS operates on a simple principle: if you survive the waiting room, you probably didn’t need A&E.

[SideEffectsMayVary @SideEffectsM]

@Luizmd

[SideEffectsMayVary @SideEffectsM]

In pain, so I blasted the tunes and did 20 minutes on the exercise bike to loosen up. Because apparently, my body responds to suffering by requesting an encore.

[SideEffectsMayVary @SideEffectsM]

@SoulessCourage @chelszzn

[SideEffectsMayVary @SideEffectsM]

@clarenceTerre The stick

[SideEffectsMayVary @SideEffectsM]

@ThomasRhinehar Casserole 🤮

[SideEffectsMayVary @SideEffectsM]

Raised by a pristine-clean mum, yet somehow my sister grew up to be an absolute scruff.

Genetics really said, “Fuck it.”

[SideEffectsMayVary @SideEffectsM]

If my sister moved out, I’d have a lot less cleaning to do.

Mostly because I’d finally stop cleaning up after her.

[SideEffectsMayVary @SideEffectsM]

@EmilySm43 Kick him in his shrunken steriod testicles.

[SideEffectsMayVary @SideEffectsM]

@andyburnham You can do this on the AA app too just for your information 😁

[SideEffectsMayVary @SideEffectsM]

@trumplicans2024 Hyundai i20

[SideEffectsMayVary @SideEffectsM]

Just pulled out a painful ingrown toenail.

Absolutely nothing says “self-care” like performing DIY podiatric surgery in your own bathroom.

[SideEffectsMayVary @SideEffectsM]

@sqsehrish 52

[SideEffectsMayVary @SideEffectsM]

@Sarahtexe2 In the disabled toilet.