The Boston Celtics have emerged as top contenders to sign Otto Porter Jr. if/when the Jazz buy him out. Boston believes the veteran’s “decades of wisdom” will help “father” the team alongside Al Horford.
Doc Rivers was reportedly “pleasantly surprised” upon seeing Damian Lillard in the Bucks practice facility for the first time. He had previously urged the front office to pursue a “co-star” for Giannis Antetokounmpo.
Detroit Pistons F Isaiah Stewart punched Drew Eubanks in the back tunnels of the Suns arena today. Sources say this situation arose after Eubanks joked that his hair looks better than Stewart’s. Stewart deemed Eubanks was “out of line”. More to come.
The Dallas Mavericks were “determined” to part ways with Grant Williams after he “rubbed a lot of people the wrong way”. Team sources say his departure became “imminent” after he described Jason Kidd as “the flyest white boy he knows” in a post-game speech.
League sources claim that Bulls president of basketball operations, Arturas Karnisovas, didn’t make any phone calls or answer the phone a single time during the day of the trade deadline. Those close to Karnisovas believe he “didn’t want to break his 8 hour mewing streak.”
“Simone Fettuccine? Thats his name? When I first saw him, I thought he was one of Gallo’s guys I even called security. Seriously, I looked at his stats this morning and I’m looking forward to learning about him and if he can play or not.”
Monty Williams on Simone Fetecchio
I sat down with Scottie Barnes today and asked him about his all-star leap:
“All my life I��ve been surrounded by a ton of teachers, I’ve just been able to apply it. I’ve been watching more film on the short bus rides to the airport and thats helped me a lot too.”
“At my hall of fame speech, I’ll be able to joke about how many times I got to enjoy some extra vacation because I got snubbed from the All Star game. We’ll laugh about all-star games and coronavirus and all these things that don’t matter.”
Gobert on being snubbed from the ASG.
The Lakers have reportedly “checked in” on Danilo Gallinari after Detroit’s locker room mishap in which Gallinari “insisted on” kissing Isaiah Stewart on both cheeks.
Celtics all-star Jaylen Brown is “seriously considering” participating in the Slam Dunk Contest. However, NBA Commissioner Adam Silver is reportedly “hesitant” to extend Brown an invite due to concerns regarding “a lack of ambidexterity”.
A lot of you may be wondering where Simon Stiles has been. Well, that’s me. I have successfully completed my pilgrimage to Sri Lanka via foot. After some reflection, I have decided that I will tell the story of Adam Silver’s NBA no b*ll**it. “No friends in the industry!” - Kanye.
Jamal Murray and his team are considering suing Take-Two Interactive Software Inc., the whole owner of the NBA2K franchise, for character defamation over his in-game jump shot and player rating.
I asked Brandon Miller on how he felt about social media framing him as unintelligent:
“Stupid is not for me man. Stupid is for the young girl struggling to read Dr. Seuss. This is what I do, a girl not being able to read, struggling to pass 1st grade, that’s stupid.”
I had the privilege of playing 20 questions with Dwight Howard last night. To begin our session, I asked him if prime Dwight would be the best center in the NBA today. His response:
“Of course, the American league has gotten soft. A decade ago, I would’ve thrown Jokic around.”
I’ve been getting over 10,000 DMs a day for the past three weeks asking where I was between Sep 2022 and May 2023. The truth is I went on a no technology retreat to Jakarta, Indonesia to find myself spiritually. It was a great trip, but I couldn’t be happier to be back reporting!
Team officials believe that Michael Jordan’s infatuation with Miller and his knowledge of 80’s basketball during a pre-draft meeting played an unfairly large role in Charlotte’s choice.
Some high-ranking officials in Charlotte’s organization are already regretting the decision to select Brandon Miller over Scoot Henderson, sources tell me.