Sir Alan Potato

Actor, bon viveur and Mashingtons Mash spokesman since 1952

[Sir Alan Potato @SirAlanPotato]

Sir Alan Potato has never been interested in appearing on local radio, only mash.

[Sir Alan Potato @SirAlanPotato]

Sir Alan Potato has never been interested in gender-neutral product rebranding, only mash....unless it annoys Piers Morgan then call me Pat.

[Sir Alan Potato @SirAlanPotato]

What? I don't know no Steve.

[Sir Alan Potato @SirAlanPotato]

Sir Alan Potato has never been interested in not consistently meeting the high standards required by the ministerial code of treating civil servants with consideration and respect, only mash.

[Sir Alan Potato @SirAlanPotato]

Sir Alan "regrets that he fell asleep during this event and then waking with full night terrors", adding he has never been interested in being awake after 6pm, only mash.

[Sir Alan Potato @SirAlanPotato]

Join Sir Alan for Britain's Biggest Mash Party today at 4am! Guests include: mash, no-one else.

[Sir Alan Potato @SirAlanPotato]

Sir Alan Potato has never been interested in going outside, only mash. #StayAtHomeSaveLives

[Sir Alan Potato @SirAlanPotato]

Sir Alan has never been interested in imagining there's no heaven, only mash.

[Sir Alan Potato @SirAlanPotato]

@InvaderAce1 @benbakerbooks GET OFF MY LAWN, BEATNIK. I MASHED SOME MASH FOR YOUR GENERATION. AND HAVE NEVER BEEN INTERESTED IN IT. BRACKETS MASH.

[Sir Alan Potato @SirAlanPotato]

Sir Alan Potato has never been interested in leaving, only mash.

[Sir Alan Potato @SirAlanPotato]

HAPPY NEW MASH. AND OLD MASH. AS LONG AS THERE'S MASH. #MASH

[Sir Alan Potato @SirAlanPotato]

Did you catch Sir Alan's cameo on tonight's Gavin and Stacey? He was some mash. Merry Mashmas one and all (mash).

[Sir Alan Potato @SirAlanPotato]

Sir Alan Potato has never been interested in decorating the Christmas tree, only mash.

[Trudi @Trudski2012]

What’s something you can say during sex and whilst decorating the Christmas tree

[Sir Alan Potato @SirAlanPotato]

Sir Alan has never been interested in sugared babes, only mash.

[Sir Alan Potato @SirAlanPotato]

#MyUnpopularOpinionIs mash.

[Sir Alan Potato @SirAlanPotato]

Sir Alan Potato has never been interested in humourous light remembrances of the recent past, only mash. @looksunfamiliar

[Sir Alan Potato @SirAlanPotato]

UPDATE: Sir Alan Potato found. He was "behind some boxes".

[Sir Alan Potato @SirAlanPotato]

@InvaderAce1 @dontletschart @_Retrospecticus WHAT? I DONT KNOW NO STEVE.

[Sir Alan Potato @SirAlanPotato]

EMERGENCY TWEET: Has anyone seen Sir Alan Potato? He was last seen a day ago and describes his interests as "mash" and "not not mash". Please send any tips to us c/o MashWatch'19 sponsored by Mashington's Mash ("try it warm!")