Slater Harrison

I have many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany. IG: slater_harrison

[Slater Harrison @SlaterHarrison2]

Well, it happened. After 10 loving years together, my first and only Twitter has left me. They say it was ‘hacked’ but I know the truth.

[Slater Harrison @SlaterHarrison2]

How it feels closing your laptop before a holiday weekend

[Slater Harrison @SlaterHarrison2]

My bodega guy: This weather is crazy. So hot then cold again next week, it’s making me get sick.

Me: Ah I know man, it’s rough, me too.

My bodega guy: Na you get sick cause you’re always lit!

Me: 🥴🥴🥴

[Slater Harrison @SlaterHarrison2]

I know I’m getting older cause I’m starting to kinda almost maybe like mornings

[Slater Harrison @SlaterHarrison2]

Hate when I’m in bed and successfully take my socks off with just my feet but no one’s there to see it

[Slater Harrison @SlaterHarrison2]

I always feel bad for the placebo group when the real group improves dramatically like that sucks dude

[Slater Harrison @SlaterHarrison2]

Dear Brooklyn, we get it, but please for the love of god BRING BACK BATHROOM MIRRORS

[Slater Harrison @SlaterHarrison2]

I wish I could stick to something as well as a coaster sticks to the bottom of my beer

[Slater Harrison @SlaterHarrison2]

I got high then immediately was told by a stranger that “life is a limited time offer” and I’ll never be the same

[Slater Harrison @SlaterHarrison2]

If you have a UTI listening to The Cranberries helps

[Slater Harrison @SlaterHarrison2]

Is punctuation hot again?

[Slater Harrison @SlaterHarrison2]

@TroyHasEbola

[Slater Harrison @SlaterHarrison2]

How it feels anytime I find another shiny gray hair

[Slater Harrison @SlaterHarrison2]

Being on public transportation when you have a cough attack is truly one of the worst predicaments in life

[Slater Harrison @SlaterHarrison2]

I’ve decided I want my last words to be whatever Ethan Hawke says next

[Slater Harrison @SlaterHarrison2]

Nothing was scarier than your sister catching you wearing her clothes without asking

[Slater Harrison @SlaterHarrison2]

Every dog and their owner in NYC right now

[Slater Harrison @SlaterHarrison2]

Fellow NYers, do not get duped by the nice weather this week. We know WE KNOW it will turn on us again

[Slater Harrison @SlaterHarrison2]

@TroyHasEbola Looks more like Prince

[Slater Harrison @SlaterHarrison2]

I think it’s cute how the local news reminds us about daylight saving time. Feels like when your mom left a note in your lunchbox. (Also, it’s tonight everyone)

[Slater Harrison @SlaterHarrison2]

No Zyns for 2 days! Not cause the snowstorm. That’s a complete coincidence