Clutchman

Nigerian. Witty Joker. Professional overthinker.

[Raven @raven_brah]

HR recruiters when you apply to a job they posted

[Clutchman @SlaveLordAy]

@TopGyaru Well it's code geass not code gecock

[aether @bluewdrift]

This is free advice from an expensive psychologist.
If you're an anxious person, do everything for fun. Go to a job interview for fun. Submit documents for fun. Start a blog for fun. Anxiety feeds on importance. Don't make everything a matter of life and death.

[Clutchman @SlaveLordAy]

rediscovering arranged
marriages from first principles in 2026

[Dexerto @Dexerto]

Hinge's founder has created an AI dating app that's straight out of Black Mirror

There are no profiles or matches to swipe through – the AI decides who it thinks you will be compatible with

[Clutchman @SlaveLordAy]

'Red Alert' but we still have to go to work.

Get serious 😒

[UK Health Security Agency @UKHSA]

🔴⚠️ A Red Heat-Health Alert has been issued across the Midlands and southern England until 25 June. This is the highest level of alert and indicates a risk to everyone's health, not just vulnerable groups. Northern England is under an Amber alert.

[Clutchman @SlaveLordAy]

@deepfates 'Pivotal' is literally the word.

[Clutchman @SlaveLordAy]

Because a car 'looks' good does not mean the engine is optimal.

Work out not just for structure but also function.(in this case cardiorespiratory and bone/muscle health).

[virgo. @pesomsj]

if im skinny why am i working out? quickly

[Clutchman @SlaveLordAy]

@sinnervideos They look like they might be related

[WelBeast @WelBeast]

If he sets up a GofundMe to raise the £2.35M I’ll gladly chip in and rally others to do so as well.

No one should go to prison for making the game affordable and accessible to everyone.

The only reason he’s going to jail is because he took profits off greedy broadcasters.

[Clutchman @SlaveLordAy]

"Your crush is coming act normal"

Me:

[sr. diego lima @SrDiegoLima]

assim são as poses em movimento que um modelo faz para campanhas esportivas

[Massimo @Rainmaker1973]

The Venus Guard

[Clutchman @SlaveLordAy]

@KillerCrowMe @PoliceRealites Just shoot him in the legs...it's close range..one would hope they've been trained for this

[Clutchman @SlaveLordAy]

And that's why we have to stop calling it 'corruption' and start calling it what it actually is CANNIBALISM

[Hazel Kaizoku @meister_kwame]

African corruption doesn’t even make sense when you deep it . It’s beyond green .

Why are you diverting funds meant for hospitals. Like what’s the point

[Clutchman @SlaveLordAy]

@Afrik_diamond @kipkoecheruiyot Two things can be true.

[Clutchman @SlaveLordAy]

Nepotism even in the tiniest of places

[Anish Moonka @anishmoonka]

In 2020, a Stockholm University lab mixed sperm and egg fluid from 16 couples in a dish. Some men's sperm got pulled toward the fluid much harder than others. And in half the cases, the egg picked a stranger's sperm over the partner's.

The egg releases a chemical bait. Sperm carry tiny smell sensors on their heads that pick up that bait. When the smell matches, the sperm speeds up and swims straight at the egg. When it doesn't, the sperm slows down or loses its line. The lead researcher, John Fitzpatrick, called it a chemical breadcrumb trail.

The sperm race is mostly a myth. A man releases around 100 million sperm at a time. Only about 250 ever reach the egg. The rest die along the way. The vagina is acidic and kills most of them. The cervix makes thick mucus that traps them like flypaper. The womb's immune system attacks them as foreign invaders. And half of the survivors pick the wrong fallopian tube, because only one of the two tubes has the egg in it.

By the time anyone even gets close, the race is already over. Then the egg picks.

The egg is selecting for immune-system genes. The more different the father's immune genes are from the mother's, the wider the range of diseases their child can fight off later. So the egg favors sperm that bring more genetic diversity.

Fitzpatrick thinks this could explain some of the 30% of infertility cases doctors label "unexplained." For some couples, their bodies just don't chemically match, even when everything else does.

Out of 100 million sperm, your father's chemistry was the one the egg agreed to let in. Which means all of us are, in some way, the quiet outcome of a chemistry test no one studied for.

[Clutchman @SlaveLordAy]

@Emmaotyy @Goobiepopp This is the only right answer ☝️. You gotta assert dominance now

[Clutchman @SlaveLordAy]

@naiivememe *Confuse us

[Clutchman @SlaveLordAy]

@Hipotelab Aristotle been really quiet since this dropped

[Clutchman @SlaveLordAy]

@costagizas @TennisTV Nah Alex isn't getting past VV

[Clutchman @SlaveLordAy]

@PauloGaspar30 @ROLEXMCMASTERS Bro saw the future