KrustyKryptonite

[KrustyKryptonite @SmokeKryptonite]

My toxic trait is when you ask me something and it sounds like a song from the 80s or 90s so i'll sing the melody using your sentence whilst not answering your question but hoping you'll sing along.

#ToxicTrait #WhatDidYouSay #CanYouRepeatThat

[KrustyKryptonite @SmokeKryptonite]

Drake the type of dude to get a boner and say: "Boyoyoing"

#DrakeTheType #drake21savage #drizzy

[KrustyKryptonite @SmokeKryptonite]

What you do with the lid of your pudding will tell me all I need to know about you. #TheTruthIsOutThere

[KrustyKryptonite @SmokeKryptonite]

I'm just gonna say it #PeeWeeHerman did nothing wrong. Mainstream media railroaded his Image.

[KrustyKryptonite @SmokeKryptonite]

Uber needs a special section of ride choice...
I want to be picked up in a batmobile to get milk and diapers at Walmart.

#Uber #Batman #Walmart #whatsup #cars

[KrustyKryptonite @SmokeKryptonite]

*Fetty Wap hears "W.A.P" for the first time.

Fetty Wap: "Am I a fucking joke to you?"

[KrustyKryptonite @SmokeKryptonite]

Trump gonna be handing these out to his supporters soon. #TrumpBanned #2021

[KrustyKryptonite @SmokeKryptonite]

Its harder to get into a McDonald's bathroom than it was today for the terrorists at Capitol hill. #ThisIsAmerica

[KrustyKryptonite @SmokeKryptonite]

Me: "I haven't seen walnuts in awhile.

Wish on Facebook be like:

[KrustyKryptonite @SmokeKryptonite]

Me: "I don't think those edibles are any good. I wasted 15$ on that trash."

The edible:

[KrustyKryptonite @SmokeKryptonite]

Lex Luger: "I am the Total Package!"

Package: "This item is not available for Prime Delivery."

[KrustyKryptonite @SmokeKryptonite]

Some of you never downloaded skins for winamp to stunt on your homies and it shows.

[KrustyKryptonite @SmokeKryptonite]

Sneak peek of the music director of GTA 6 curating the playlists for the radio stations.

[KrustyKryptonite @SmokeKryptonite]

Her: "I'm gonna f*ck your brains out... you ain't never had sex like this before...you just wait till I get you alone."

Also her:

[KrustyKryptonite @SmokeKryptonite]

Her: "where'd you learn to use your fingers like that?"

Me: "you wouldn't get it."

[KrustyKryptonite @SmokeKryptonite]

When I don't do what my wife asks in 15 seconds.

[KrustyKryptonite @SmokeKryptonite]

When I catch wifey taking a deuce in the shower. 😈🍑🍆

[KrustyKryptonite @SmokeKryptonite]

When you listen to Drake albums when you're alone.

[KrustyKryptonite @SmokeKryptonite]

It's the year 2021...
You're heading home from a date. You're going to eat the chinese leftovers from last night and watch Tory Lanez new show: Life After Quarantine on HBO. It was a good day...

[KrustyKryptonite @SmokeKryptonite]

Nobody:

Drake: "she was a quaranteen queen when the pandemic just start/ now a woman/she onlyfans man's while isolatin' her heart..."