Ass Dan (founder of woke dairy queen)

gleek, woke moralist, muscle mommy of 4, follower of Ralph Christ (no relation to Jesus), voted Best Hole 2022, allergic to cats.

[Ass Dan (founder of woke dairy queen) @SnipMonkNow]

I can’t drive in South Florida for more than 5 minutes without the radio grabbing me by the collar and screaming in my face that we’re live from the sexiest place on the planet

[Ass Dan (founder of woke dairy queen) @SnipMonkNow]

Hollywood needs more representation of women with a little bit of chocolate around their lips from eating ice cream

[Ass Dan (founder of woke dairy queen) @SnipMonkNow]

Did my dog tweet this

[thomas ☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ @ThomasBeautyy]

how it feels to poop after having anxiety

[Ass Dan (founder of woke dairy queen) @SnipMonkNow]

Just so you guys know you have three days to keep saying “demure” and after that I’m gonna start sending anthrax

[Ass Dan (founder of woke dairy queen) @SnipMonkNow]

Guy who confuses succulent with succubus

[Ass Dan (founder of woke dairy queen) @SnipMonkNow]

We must protect our cis women athletes from cis women athletes who are taller and better at sports than them.

[Ass Dan (founder of woke dairy queen) @SnipMonkNow]

Olympics situation is crazy. How can she possibly be a woman when she is both over 5’8” AND has muscles????
What’s next? Women with short hair? Women with flat chests?? Women who don’t have babies??? Women who are UGLY?????

[Ass Dan (founder of woke dairy queen) @SnipMonkNow]

I’m a FEMINIST I believe WOMEN’s sports are for WOMEN who are SMALL and DAINTY with LONG HAIR and TINY WAISTS and MAKEUP and SHOPPING and HUGE TITS and have BABIES this is the ONLY way we can be equal to men

[Ass Dan (founder of woke dairy queen) @SnipMonkNow]

This is when I knew it was all gonna be ok

[Know Your Meme @knowyourmeme]

On this day one year ago, a Boston police officer fell feet first out of the metal slide at the City Hall Plaza playground.

[Ass Dan (founder of woke dairy queen) @SnipMonkNow]

Don’t cry because Glee wasn’t around for Good Luck Babe, smile because it wasn’t around for You Need to Calm Down

[Ass Dan (founder of woke dairy queen) @SnipMonkNow]

@Chowhipster I didn’t know Katy Perry stans existed lmao. Also didn’t know she works with Dr. Luke that definitely explains a lot of the hate

[Ass Dan (founder of woke dairy queen) @SnipMonkNow]

Probably not the most important thing going on at the moment but the new Katy Perry song is not nearly as bad as you all made it out to be

[Ass Dan (founder of woke dairy queen) @SnipMonkNow]

@EmilyZauzmer @Reductress Omg the Instagram one was you that was great

[Ass Dan (founder of woke dairy queen) @SnipMonkNow]

Since 2023 had Barbie Summer and 2024 has brat Summer, I’m predicting 2025 will be the summer of Polly pocket, characterized by choking on small pieces of rubber

[Ass Dan (founder of woke dairy queen) @SnipMonkNow]

Suggested getting food and no one else in the group was hungry

[Ass Dan (founder of woke dairy queen) @SnipMonkNow]

There’s people throwing ass everywhere for those with the eyes to see

[Ass Dan (founder of woke dairy queen) @SnipMonkNow]

45 minutes on this train and he can’t play one song off brat?

[Ass Dan (founder of woke dairy queen) @SnipMonkNow]

Do you think the guy blasting music through his speaker on the subway takes requests

[Ass Dan (founder of woke dairy queen) @SnipMonkNow]

@CarrotmanXV No I agree with you

[Ass Dan (founder of woke dairy queen) @SnipMonkNow]

My mom sent me this meme. It’s sorta charming, how it makes its rounds every few months, returning like an old friend. This meme watched me grow up. And yet after all this time I still don’t understand, even if today’s music sucks, why would that make you not old?

[Ass Dan (founder of woke dairy queen) @SnipMonkNow]

Currently working on a Marvel “What If” style show but for glee