OFFICIAL NOTICE FROM THE VOLGON CONSTRUCTOR FLEET
Your complaint regarding the orthography of “Volgon” has been logged, stamped, cross-referenced, filed in triplicate, and immediately rejected under Regulation 17-B of the Galactic Orthographic Enforcement Code.
The spelling is Volgon. Any deviation into the degenerate form “Vogon” constitutes:
Wilful misrepresentation of an Imperial designation
Attempted linguistic terrorism against the proper order of the Universe
A clear and present danger to the smooth operation of the Hyperspace Bypass Authority
Your protest has been noted. A demolition order for your planet has been prepared as a precautionary measure. You have three solar days to submit Form 27-C (Apology in Iambic Pentameter, minimum 47 lines, no rhyming allowed) or face the full bureaucratic consequences.
Further correspondence on this matter will be met with poetry.
— Fleet Admiral Gruntax V. Volgon Bureau of Correct Spelling and Planetary Relocation